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by Katie Peachesa January 01, 2021 4 min read

Full BDSM Guide to Bondage Handcuffs for Sex

When people think of BDSM, they often think it is a dangerous activity, and they will not be interested in talking about it. Any form of BDSM play involves trust and communication between partners. If you are seeking an adventure into the world of bondage, then I suggest you use handcuffs. Handcuffs are the best restraining device, and it can be a great turn on. If you are the submissive, being handcuffed allows you to enjoy extreme arousal from your partner because you are under their control. For dominants, it allows them to control the situation and is arousing to watch their submissive writhe in pure sexual agony. Adding handcuffs can spice up your sex life, and the possibilities are endless.

Discuss the idea with your partner first.

Many people put off using handcuffs because they don't know how to discuss it with their partner. You can always drop hints on why you want it and how you want it. You can put the idea to your partner and watch their reaction towards it. Getting them used to the idea might change their perspective.

Pick your style of handcuffs

The first step is to pick the right style of handcuffs. Always use handcuffs that have quality materials. Hypoallergic is a great material for handcuffs because they are soft, flexible, and strong. Metal handcuffs are cheap, and they can cause damage, so you shouldavoid them at all costs. Start with soft cuffs are stretchy handcuffs. It allows you to explore restraints without being stuck. You can play around in comfort, knowing you don't have to worry about finding a key. You can also try rope cuffs. They are ideal for beginners. Buckle handcuffs are the easiest to use. They are made with leather straps, and it does not irritate the skin. You can also adjust it to how you want.

Choose your position

Before you use handcuffs, you need to choose your position. You can choose to have your hands tied above your head, behind your back, or any other option you prefer. If you are going to be restrained, you have to rely on your partner to position you in the handcuffs. You should be clear about what you want and what's comfortable. Starting with your hands above your head is a simple and pleasurable position to start with, especially for beginners. It allows you to explore erogenous zones and give or receive oral sex.

Communicate

Starting on a new sexual adventure makes communicating about it essential. Always ask your partner how they are feeling and tell them what you are going to do next. They should be able to trust you throughout the process. It allows them to talk about any concerns they have. It's also essential to have a safe word before you start. Safe words are non-sexual words or phrases, your partner says when they need a time out from the play. Immediately they say it; you have to stop the activity.  You can also incorporate safe gestures they can use.

Play with temperature and other accessories

Temperature play is a great way to increase stimulation.  You can use an ice cube while your partner's hands are cuffed behind their head. You can add a blindfold to increase sensation. When one sense is deprived, others become heightened. You can watch theirreaction as you slide the ice cube all over their body.

Always check for numbness.

Using handcuffs can be fun, but it can also be dangerous, and that's why you should always be on the lookout for numbness. It's always good to eave a little space to ensure adequate circulation of blood. Good blood flow is essential for sex. To prevent any damage, ensure you leave extra space between the handcuffs and their skin. Periodically check on them to see if there is any numbness. Numbness is a sign that the handcuffs are too tight, and you should remove it immediately.

Be prepared for emergencies

An urgent situation may arise at the least convenient times, so you must always prepare for such times. Keep spare keys or a pair of scissors in case of emergency. Always use safety-edged deg scissorsbecause they easily cut through heavy-duty materials such as plastic. However, you only need to use them in case of emergencies. Asides from that, you don't need it.

Add a blindfold.

Adding a blindfold is a great accessory while using handcuffs. When you subtract stimuli from one sense, you enhance others. For example, your partner may not see and become sensitive to your touch or whisper. It makes the experience more exciting and intense. You can use a sleeping mask as a blindfold. Once the blindfold is on, the other partner is free to tease them, leaving them to guess what's coming next. You can use a light feather while you are at it.

Keep it simple

When it comes to handcuffs, it's better to start simple. Don't complicate things by trying different techniques at once. It can be intimidating for your partner, and it will ruin the whole experience. That is why blindfolds are essential. You can use it on your partner while you try out your techniques.

Conclusion

Before you start, establish consents, boundaries, and safe words. Talk to your partner about what you want and how you want it. Having this talk with your partners allows you to  discuss in detail and build a scenario that you will use. Studies show that couples who partake in BDSM are more aware of their sexual needs and desires. It is pleasurable whether you are submissive or dominant. If you are still on the fence about the concept of handcuffs, these tips above will guide you on how to use it and what to expect while you are using it.

Katie Peachesa
Katie Peachesa

Katie Peachesa is a sex and lingerie blogger based out of the urban chic Wapping in the heart of East London, United Kingdom. In her spare time, Katie enjoys photography, yoga and fitness, a bit of boxing, traveling, keeping up with the latest fashion trends and mudlarking and exploring pastoral settings. You are likely to find Katie in an artisan cafe in Brick Lane on a Saturday afternoon furiously typing her next article on her laptop whilst she is sipping on her flat white and drawing inspiration from the hustle and bustle in the heart of creative London. Katie runs the "Fashion Life Mag" and has been featured in Cosmopolitan, Allure, Grazia, Tatler, Evening Standard and other popular media outlets.


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