The Third Man What you should know about Playing with Couples

The Third Man What you should know about Playing with Couples

By Tatyana Dyachenko

Many straight and gay couples try out open relationships, which usually means that each person consents to the other having sexual encounters outside of the relationship. Threesomes are popular too, and offer the unique possibility of the simultaneous stimulation of multiple erogenous zones. It can be a little daunting being the third man (or woman) joining a couple that already has a lot of history. Choosing who you play with well, and being aware of the dynamics between the couple you join, is likely to keep the experience uncomplicated and fun.

It is always a good idea to get an idea of how both members of the couple feel about having a threesome. If one person wants the experience far less than the other does, your hot night could descend into a torrent of angry words between partners, and this would be awkward. Some couples have explicit rules about their threesome adventures, to make sure that everything stays easy. When in doubt, ask what the boundaries are, so that the experience remains enjoyably erotic for each person involved.

Different couples want different things from the third person they seek out. Some people like to be watched, and are more into having voyeuristic experiences than three way contact. If watching isn't for you, and you want to be in the thick of it, make this clear from the outset so that you won't have to sit through a night of live porn. On the other hand, what could start off as a viewing only experience could turn into an exciting threesome as everyone grows more aroused. One of the best things about threesomes is the element of surprise and unpredictability, and the variety of sexual possibilities that arise in the heat of the moment.

When you are having sex with two people at the same time, try to be equally attentive to both. Focusing all your sexual attentions on one person is likely to make the other feel left out, and a sulky and resentful atmosphere could sour the experience. This is not a major worry, considering that couples who are open to threesomes are likely to be easy going people who are hungry to try out new things.