ANAL SEX 101: TIPS & ADVICE FOR MAKING IT MORE ENJOYABLE FOR BOTH PARTNERS

Some tips and advice will come in handy to make anal sex as enjoyable as possible for both partners. They include conveying your concerns, squeezing your sphincter muscles, using lots of lube, experimenting alone, and focusing on your desire.

There is more than one way of having sex. Moreover, the definition of pleasure may differ from one person to another. Furthermore, sex is a process that involves many activities, but what makes up sex the most are the penetrations involved, whether anal or vaginal. Anal sex has its fair share of stigma and backlash, unlike vaginal penetration, oral sex, and foreplay which almost everyone appreciates. However, those who indulge in this activity have a good reason despite people's opinions. Anal play stirs up a diverse range of emotions, especially if you are new to butt play. However, there are expert tips and advice that can come in handy if you want to dive into the pleasures of anal play and make the most of it; here are some.

Convey Your Concerns  

You can ask your partner if they are into the idea of anal play or want to try it out. You will be anxious about some things, such as whether it will hurt or affect your feces afterward. These are normal concerns and the reasons why some don't like the idea of anal sex. Communicate these worries to your partner. According to Patel et al. (2018), properly prepping the anus and using a lot of lube during anal sex should not hurt. The procedure should be gradual in terms of speed, depth, and the size of the inserted object; start small and work your way up.

Squeeze the Sphincter Muscles to Relax

If you are a beginner in anal sex, loosening up will be difficult, maybe because of anxiety and stress. Suriyut et al. (2018) stated that the sphincter muscles are found around the opening of the anus that serves as valves to open and close up the anus opening. According to Fung (2013), squeezing these muscles on purpose will go a long way to helping you release some tension and stress both mentally and physically. During foreplay, as you approach anal play, consider squeezing the anus for about five to ten seconds, then relax the muscles; do this a few times. You can also place a finger or toy as you squeeze. Think of this as warming up; the more you do it, the more you relax.

Use Lots of Lube     

Lube should be the first thing in mind whenever you want to indulge in anal pleasure. According to Silverberg & Kaufman (2016), the anus doesn't produce natural lubricant. There are no directions or side effects on how much lube you should use unless you are allergic. Penetrating anything in the anus without lube may cause discomfort or even damage the anal tissues. Also, note that when using anal toys, different toys will go with different types of lube. For instance, silicone-based lube will not suit silicone toys. Therefore, consider water-based lube. Moreover, silicone and oil-based lubes are long-lasting compared to water-based lube.

Experiment Alone

If you are curious about this anal sex and how it feels, you can try it by yourself by masturbating. The best way to set out on any unexplored sexual territory is to try it on your own before bringing in your partner. This is because it will help you understand whether it works for you or not. It is also a way of experimenting with different sizes, pressure, and speeds on your anus. 

Focus on Your Desire  

As a beginner, it is obvious that anxiety and stress will have the better part of you during penetration. You might be too focused on doing everything right for your own sake that you forget the idea behind anal penetration and desire. This will act as a barrier to achieving sexual pleasure from anal sex. Instead, focus on the sensations. Be in the moment and be, and you will surely enjoy anal sex just as much as your partner.

Don't Focus Excessively on the Anus

You are likely to fixate on the body part or the sexual act in play when excited or anxious. Whether you are using your tongue, finger, toy, or penis to stimulate your partner, you need not concentrate on the bum during anal play. Also, consider doubling the pleasure by giving your partner clitoral stimulation by either rubbing with the hand or stroking with the penis.     

Introduce Toys to Your Anal Play 

Anal sex toys will serve a variety of uses, from prepping the anus to giving anal stimulation, whether flying solo or with a partner. For beginners, an anal trainer kit will do as it contains anal toys and plugs of different sizes. You can start with the smallest toy and gradually work your way up as you watch how your body and anal muscles respond to different toys.

Wait Until You are Extremely Aroused

Don't just dive into anal play. Foreplay should be a key factor before everything else. You need to be highly aroused before anything can penetrate the anus. The key to mind-blowing sex is holding off penetration and focusing on arousal first. Being aroused will ease achieving mind-blowing and toe-curling orgasms easier.

Try Different Positions

The first position that comes into mind when you think of anal sex is doggy style. This is especially with penile-anal penetration. However, it's not the only way to enjoy anal sex. You can have anal missionary, bringing you closer to your partner. Spooning is also another great position to experiment with anal sex. It dictates how deep and fast you will go with anal sex. Consider different positions, whether flying solo or with your partner.      

Conclusion

Anal play may not be that appealing to everyone. However, trying anal sex with the above advice and tips won't hurt. You can enjoy anal sex solo or with your partner. Remember to lube up since the anus does not self lubricate. Also, ensure you have prepped up the anus before you receive or give any form of penetration. Anal play is not for everyone. If you feel like it is not doing any good to you after trying it, consider other forms of sexual pleasure. Go through the above article and enjoy anal pleasure.

References

Fung, Y. C. (2013). Biomechanics: motion, flow, stress, and growth. Springer Science & Business Media.

Patel, R. R., Crane, J. S., López, J., Chan, P. A., Liu, A. Y., Tooba, R., & James, A. S. (2018). Pre-exposure prophylaxis for HIV prevention preferences among young adult African American men who have sex with men. PLoS One, 13(12), e0209484.

Silverberg, C., & Kaufman, M. (2016). The ultimate guide to sex and disability: For all of us who live with disabilities, chronic pain, and illness. Cleis Press.

Suriyut, J., Muro, S., Baramee, P., Harada, M., & Akita, K. (2020). Various significant connections of the male pelvic floor muscles with special reference to the anal and urethral sphincter muscles. Anatomical Science International, 95(3), 305-312.