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April 09, 2020 1 min read

First Time Anal Sex

By Ksenia Sobchak

Dear Martina

My boyfriend keeps asking if we can have anal sex. He's mentioned that he's tried it before with an ex and tells me I'll really enjoy it, yet when we tried he couldn't penetrate me and it hurt so much! I'm worried I'm not giving him what he wants and that he'll think I'm a prude but I really don't want to do it again!

I do think anal sex is very pleasurable for a woman as long as you let yourself relax. Although we have no G-spot up there it does feel amazing and can intensify orgasms intensely. You may be worried that he will compare you to his ex or like me you may see this as a much more intimate act than vaginal sex however forget about the ex and just think of the pleasure you will receive.

We lose our virginity so quickly that it's quite nice to hold onto our anal virginity for a little longer. Let him know that you feel you will be sharing something very special. Ask if he'd help you to relax first (as if you're nervous, your muscles tense which will make it impossible) maybe with a massage or some strokes. Use lots of lube and breathe out slowly as his penis enters you.

A great tip I got was to neck half a bottle of martini first- that certainly did the trick.

If he's being insensitive or really harassing you for it even though you don't feel ready, save your bum virginity for someone who matters.