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by Katie Peachesa April 09, 2020 2 min read

How Do I know if She's Aroused?

By Tatyana Dyachenko

Dear Martina,

My girlfriend has admitted that she has faked orgasms in the past. We've talked about it and I really want to be able to bring her to climax using my tongue or my hands. She can't come through sex alone. The thing is now she's faked it I'm worried she'll do it again. I'm not exactly an expert at giving clitoral orgasms and I really want to be able to know when I'm doing it right. Is there anything I can look for that will show me I'm heading in the right direction?

Dear Faker Flicker

Due to women faking orgasms in porn - the one medium where men can actually look for a length of time at a vagina in all its glory, many men are actually a little clueless about the clitoris. Not about how to stimulate it, as with great communication (and these tips) that can be learned, but how it changes with arousal. You will notice when you start that the clitoris is hardly noticeable, usually hidden under the hood. However as you gently stimulate it, it grows as blood rushes to the surface making it not only bigger but harder too. Think of it as the female erection. This is why long flat licks work great at the beginning during oral but little flicks work best at the end.

You can also ask your girlfriend to let you know with sounds if you are hitting the right spots. The main thing is to let her relax, don't rush, take your time and explore. She'll love you for it and when you do get to the orgasm, you'll notice the difference from her fake ones straight away.

Katie Peachesa
Katie Peachesa

Katie Peachesa is a sex and lingerie blogger based out of the urban chic Wapping in the heart of East London, United Kingdom. In her spare time, Katie enjoys photography, yoga and fitness, a bit of boxing, traveling, keeping up with the latest fashion trends and mudlarking and exploring pastoral settings. You are likely to find Katie in an artisan cafe in Brick Lane on a Saturday afternoon furiously typing her next article on her laptop whilst she is sipping on her flat white and drawing inspiration from the hustle and bustle in the heart of creative London. Katie runs the "Fashion Life Mag" and has been featured in Cosmopolitan, Allure, Grazia, Tatler, Evening Standard and other popular media outlets.


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