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by Katie Peachesa April 11, 2020 3 min read

How to Use your Finger to Bring Your Lover to Orgasm

By Ekaterina Mironova

Many men will have perfected the art of oral sex on women through early relationships. Although every woman’s anatomy is different, the tongue is one of the easiest ways to bring a woman to orgasm. The tongue can be used for hard flicks and soft gentle laps, making sure your partner quivers with desire.

Of course the constant lubrication also helps making it better than any sex toy on the market and manufacturers are always struggling to bring out a toy that mirrors these qualities. However oral sex is thrilling, but the vast majority of men that excel at oral would find it difficult to bring their partner to orgasm using just a finger.

Being able to use fingers for orgasms is actually a much better technique to have as even in semi-public places, the man can arouse you without ever ripping off your clothes, so why don’t men take the time to master it?

Not only does it make car journeys more interesting, or even a trip to a cinema, being able to kiss your lover as he brings you to orgasm adds a whole new layer of intimacy, something that is impossible when his tongue is otherwise engaged. It also allows him to make you climax as he penetrates either from behind or the side, increasing your chances of simultaneous orgasm.

All women know just how to make a man ejaculate through using their hands alone, this is one trick we learn even before we lose our virginity. Surely it’s about time men learned this for us?

How to Do it Right

Don’t Assume Every Woman is the Same
Unfortunately for men when they meet a new partner they have to learn from scratch how to turn them on. Of course some techniques may be useful however every woman’s clitoris is in a different place and every female needs different stimulation in order to orgasm. Some can quite easily come through penetration alone whereas others need clitoral stimulation and of course some can endure stronger pressures than others.

Start Slowly

It’s best to have oodles of foreplay before attempting to give a woman an orgasm through your fingers the first time. Lots of kissing, nibbling and sucking of nipples will ensure that the natural lubrication makes your job a lot easier. When your hands do travel lower, ignore the clitoris to start with and instead use very wet fingers lightly, teasing the labia and entrance to the vagina.

Pressure is Key

Some men assume just placing the pad of their finger on the clitoris and applying pressure and movement will be enough to bring a woman to climax, however the clitoris is very sensitive and this will only make your partner want to wriggle away. Instead try light fast strokes, or gently use a well lubricated finger around the clitoris, brushing lightly over the top swiftly in between each circle.

Be a Good Listener

You’ll be able to tell if you’re doing it right by the sounds your lover is making. If they wriggle closer they are expecting more pressure, if they move away they would like you to apply less. They will moan as they become increasingly aroused and you will recognise the sounds from when you’ve brought them to orgasm before. Follow their lead and carry on doing exactly what you are to give them an earth shattering orgasm in your arms!

Katie Peachesa
Katie Peachesa

Katie Peachesa is a sex and lingerie blogger based out of the urban chic Wapping in the heart of East London, United Kingdom. In her spare time, Katie enjoys photography, yoga and fitness, a bit of boxing, traveling, keeping up with the latest fashion trends and mudlarking and exploring pastoral settings. You are likely to find Katie in an artisan cafe in Brick Lane on a Saturday afternoon furiously typing her next article on her laptop whilst she is sipping on her flat white and drawing inspiration from the hustle and bustle in the heart of creative London. Katie runs the "Fashion Life Mag" and has been featured in Cosmopolitan, Allure, Grazia, Tatler, Evening Standard and other popular media outlets.


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