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July 29, 2022 4 min read


The image of rape is perpetuated through beliefs about rape that empower offenders and maintain the shame for rape victims. Cruel remarks and callous responses to the news of rape give people the impression that women love and enjoy being raped.

People must understand the truth about rape and reject the misconceptions to eradicate the stigma of rape and facilitate recovery for rape victims. A ravishment or rape fantasy is a sexual fantasy in which one imagines or pretends to be compelled or to coerce another into sexual action (also known as rape play). Coercive sex is a common theme in sexual roleplay. It is a kind of sexual arousal, including rape and stockholm syndrome, called rape pornography. Some women say that after the first rebuffing approaches, they suddenly grow to like the experience ( in their fantasies).

Factors To Blame For Women's Fantasies of Non-Consensual Sex

Persistent Guilt and Shame About Female Sexuality

For a long time, young women have been taught and pushed to conform to restricted gender norms. Moreover, they have been restricted on how they should be allowed to express their sexuality in society. According to Mollon, Wise & Williams (2018), sex and sexual sensations are frequently accompanied by worry, guilt, or shame. This is tragically still the case today. Srinivasan (2018) stated that women with rape fantasies are less likely to feel guilty or ashamed about acting on their sexual impulses since they aren't directly accountable for what happens. We may fantasize about having sex with someone else if we feel embarrassed about taking control of our sexual impulses and wish to transfer them to someone else's body. Doing something for someone else excuses us from any responsibility or shame we may feel for our actions. When women were questioned about their experiences with rape fantasies, most said they first resisted before having a wonderful time (real-life rape does not apply). While the "victim" may not experience the fear, shock, bewilderment, wrath, and disgust typical of real rape, most persons who fantasize about being raped see a passionate encounter in which minimal force is used.

Media and Pornography's Prevailing Narratives

Males are shown as domineering and exercise control over submissive, mostly women because that's how the press and porn shows portray sex. You'll see powerful males grasping weak, swooning ladies if you browse through classic sexual novels or glance at the covers. They feed into the assumption that women must submit to the dominating role of male sexuality. Moreover, women are to act on their sexual cravings whenever they want (females having less authority to object) even though rape and sexual assault are seldom shown overtly in these books. So, that's the why. However, is it possible that fantasizing about getting raped reveals anything about our personalities? Are some women more inclined to fantasize about being raped than others?

It's nothing to be alarmed about, as with most erotic visions. Fantasizing about non-consenting sexual acts is not the same as saying you want to be sexually assaulted in real life. Horeck (2013) stated that women who fantasize about rape don't want to experience it. What individuals find sexually titillating in their imaginations may be upsetting when brought to fruition in the actual world. The fact that you fantasize about getting raped doesn't indicate you're a pro-rapist or a sexist. It has no bearing on who you are. Provided you're having fun with your dreams, there's no need to be worried about it. Our personality, mental health, or sexual preferences are not affected by fantasizing about forced sex (or any other sort of intercourse).

Those Who Fantasize About Rape Have No Higher Risk of Being a Rape Victim of Sexual Assault Than Anybody Else

According to Fahs (2011), women with the greatest rape fantasies were the most sexually free and self-accepting. This group's dreams about sex were also the most mutually agreeable. Because of this, people who fantasize about forced sex may be expressing a readiness to accept all kinds of sexual experiences as part of their sexual lives. As a rape survivor, you're never more likely to have rape fantasies than someone who has never been sexually assaulted or raped. It's important to highlight those dreams of rape don't suggest that the real-life event was less terrible.

Shame, perplexity, and remorse are common reactions to a rape dream. Some people may believe they were complicit in the abuse or even loved it. This is just not accurate and diminishes the impact of what occurred. Whether these dreams occur in the immediate aftermath or before a sexual assault, they exhibit no resemblance to or diminish the reality or legitimacy of the crime committed. When it comes to thoughts of forced sex, it's essential to understand your sentiments. It's perfectly fine if you have dreams about getting raped if you're having a good time and don't feel guilty or uncomfortable about it. A pleasant sexual fantasy is no longer pleasurable sexual fantasies if they are obtrusive or disturbing to the narrator. What may begin as sexual fantasies for those who have been assaulted may quickly become a consuming and invasive state of mind for those who have been assaulted.


If you've established that your dreams are thoughts about having sex that can be controlled and that you find it enticing rather than upsetting, you should be free to indulge in them. Fantasies are more real for some women. An important turn-on for some people is the idea of having their permission and control snatched away from them, rather than the actual struggle itself. Why does this happen? Even though we'd be appalled by the actuality of forced sex, why does the idea of it sway so many of us? So why is the thought of renouncing one's sexuality, only to do so anyhow, so attractive? some psychologists come up with a few theories to explain why. Go through the above article and understand the myth about rape fantasies.


Fahs, B. (2011). Performing sex: The making and unmaking of women's erotic lives. Suny Press.

Horeck, T. (2013). Public rape: Representing violation in fiction and film. Routledge.

Mollon, P., Wise, I., & Williams, P. (2018). Shame and jealousy: The hidden turmoils. Routledge.

Srinivasan, A. (2018). Does anyone have the right to sex?. London Review of Books, 40(6), 5-10.

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