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by Katie Peachesa April 14, 2020 3 min read

Sucking isn't Fucking and Eating isn't Cheating - Where Do We Draw The Line?

By Elena Ognivtseva

This month’s mantra tripping off everyone’s tongues is the 2012 proverb “sucking isn’t fucking and eating isn’t cheating.” Those is tenuous relationships are lapping this up (pardon the pun) as they now consider oral to be a little bit of fun and not adultery at all.

However, just where do you draw the line? Of course each act depends on the two people involved in the original relationship and their attitudes towards monogamy, but could you really get away with a luscious licking orgasm without being handed the divorce papers?

Is Porn Cheating?

The majority of us do share the same belief that porn isn’t cheating at all. Watching others enjoy sexual acts on a TV screen or at a cinema is purely entertainment and, despite the fantasies they may conjure up, is completely harmless.

Strip Clubs

Bringing porn into the 4D world is still considered safe. As women heckle Chippendales on stage and men stuff tenners into a tiny G-string, many couples would accept this as a bit of fun.

Sex Shows

Even Sex shows such as the sensual circus that displays men and women copulating within touching distance are not considered cheating. Some husbands and wives may be a little jealous or put out, however divorce papers would hardly ensue after a visit.

Phone Sex

Hotlines make millions each year manned with anonymous women making the right noises on the end of the phone. Of course, men ring to feel naughty, to feel as if they are including someone else in their masturbation but these numbers on a phone bill may produce an argument but not divorce.

Dogging/ Voyeurism

Now this is where the lines begin to blur, as according to some just watching “normal people” – that is those who do not have sex for a living, have sex in front of you is considered by some to be a blatant act of adultery. However, it’s not too far from the porn, really all that’s changed is a TV screen for a windscreen.

Web Cam

Many now partake in a little web cam action, either through people they have met online or using a credit card to pay for services. Sharing intimate parts of the body, people can talk and play as if in the same room, but still this would not be considered the ultimate adultery.

Private Show

So consider this. If your partner were to arrange a time to meet a friend they found sexually attractive and asked them to strip in front of them, without any touching at all, would this be considered cheating?

Mutual Masturbation

With one step further, no touching between parties, both could easily sit either side of a room and pleasure themselves as the other watched. Would this be any different to porn? If so how? What blurs the lines to make this unacceptable whilst the addition of a screen is purely innocent?

With the array of sexual exploration possibilities on offer and the acceptance that sucking isn’t fucking, or eating cheating, it’s easy to become confused. When meeting a new partner, questions would be raised about the future to see if you both shared the same ideals for family, career or life, yet now it seems we need to vet carefully to ensure we end up with someone who shares our beliefs of exactly what is and what isn’t adultery.

Katie Peachesa
Katie Peachesa

Katie Peachesa is a sex and lingerie blogger based out of the urban chic Wapping in the heart of East London, United Kingdom. In her spare time, Katie enjoys photography, yoga and fitness, a bit of boxing, traveling, keeping up with the latest fashion trends and mudlarking and exploring pastoral settings. You are likely to find Katie in an artisan cafe in Brick Lane on a Saturday afternoon furiously typing her next article on her laptop whilst she is sipping on her flat white and drawing inspiration from the hustle and bustle in the heart of creative London. Katie runs the "Fashion Life Mag" and has been featured in Cosmopolitan, Allure, Grazia, Tatler, Evening Standard and other popular media outlets.


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