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The Missionary Position: Why Do We Love To Hate It?

The Missionary Position: Why Do We Love To Hate It?

  • by Jekaterina Gussarova
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The Missionary Position: Why Do We Love To Hate It?

  • by Jekaterina Gussarova

Content Verification

Katie Lasson
Written by:

Sex and Relationship Adviser
Veronika Matutyte
Medically Reviewed by:

Medical Doctor
Barbara Santini
Fact Checked by:

Psychologist and Sex and Relationships Advisor

🔍 Key Points at a Glance

✅ The missionary position: a timeless classic loved (and sometimes mocked) by many.


🤔 Often seen as "vanilla," but it's anything but when you spice it up creatively!


💡 Perfect for intimacy, eye contact, and a touch of cheeky experimentation.

🌟 Key Advice and Tips from Our Experts

🔥 **Embrace creativity**: Bring in pillows for better angles and extra comfort.


💋 **Communicate**: Share what feels great and be open to trying small tweaks.


🎭 **Don’t fear variety**: Add playful elements like lingerie or subtle toys to elevate the experience.

Most people practice missionary severally. It feels like it is ingrained in our DNA, almost the first instinct when having sex. Of the many sex positions available to choose from, why missionary? And, is it that gratifying?

Sometimes the choice of a sex position boils down to beliefs, practices, and culture. For instance, the Chinese believe that females were born to face up during sexual intercourse. Some even trust that the position is critical for conception.

So Why the Bad Reputation

As mentioned above, the missionary sex position was and still is the main position of choice for many couples. Other than it being a monotonous cycle, people love it. Besides, it is perfectly comfortable and convenient. One doesn’t get to use too much energy, as is the case with other sex positions.

There isn’t Much to See

Sexual intercourse becomes pleasurable and fun when you get to see the act. Someone might also argue that sex is about feeling more than seeing. It is entirely a person’s preference that will determine that unless you are a sadomasochist. It is also argued that some male partners think it is romantic if they have visuals during intercourse. Hence, they would love to see every thrust they make during sex. On the other hand, face-to-face sex might make your partner lose the courage to talk during sex. Choosing other sex positions gives you and your partner the perfect view of your bodies.

You Are Right Up in Each Other’s Face

A missionary sex position may not be the right one to explore with your newly found partner. You can always try doggy style, cuddle, or reverse cowgirl for sensational pleasures. However, before introducing a new sex position in your sex life, consider weighing your general experience and techniques.

He is Doing All the Work

Gone are the days when the male partner did all the work during sex. The power of control in sex should be shared to give life to a sexual relationship. Why strain on missionary positions when there are various sex positions you can try and make a great sexual impression? The missionary position leaves everything for the male, which is not right sexually, emotionally, and mentally. Sex is all about enjoying and making fun memories and not getting tired in the process. There are other sex positions like cowgirl’s helper, magic mountain, reversed cowgirl, cross booty, and champagne room.

It is Basic

Today, couples find complicated sex positions pleasurable and entertaining. This is something you will never find in a missionary sex position. This position is generally lame, uncomplicated, and simple. This is something most couples find boring and less pleasurable. Moreover, the missionary position has been there for decades. Therefore, trying complicated sex positions like wheelbarrow, upstanding citizen, the spider, and the good ex is healthy.

It is not Ideal if He is Husky.

Generally, this position doesn't fit the husky men. Nothing is pleasurable in a sexual session when your partner breathes heavily, sweats over you, and presses you down on the mattress. This is why most partners hate the missionary position. If you must engage in sex, try out sex positions such as a stand and deliver, wheelbarrow, the good ex, and tabletop.

What is He Supposed to do with the Arms?

In missionary, there isn't any specified spot for the arms during intercourse. Your partner can put the arms by your sides or under you. However, this feels extremely awkward since it gives you the right position to deliver perfect thrusts. It also makes the whole session uncomfortable. Therefore, consider looking for better sex positions for a better and more comfortable sexual experience.

You Are Fucking While Lying on Top of Each Other

Pleasurable and enjoyable sex requires creativity, which is absent in missionary positions. You can never think of a better way to satisfy your partner without them getting tired. Keep your partner satisfied sexually without using more energy or tiring them during the session, even before climaxing or orgasms.

You Can Wind Up Bursting Your Partners Eardrum

 Moans and screams are normal during sex, and no one can ever prevent that from happening. Generally, it is not done willingly. Your partner's face will be close to your neck. Therefore, all the noise will go to their ears. Screaming during orgasms or climax directs the noise to the ears, which might completely damage the eardrums.  Sex should be safe and comfortable for both partners.

Limited Sex Exploration

With missionary sex, partners are limited to only one stimulation and sexual sensation, yet you can explore others. You can stimulate various body parts to increase sensitivity during vaginal penetration for multiple pleasures and orgasmic experiences. These parts include nipples, clitoris, labia, perineum, and balls. This is why the missionary sex position is not the partner's favorite. Therefore, consider choosing other sex positions that will give you additional pleasures like the chairman, butter churner, and golden arch.

Final Thoughts

Sex position matters a lot when it comes to sexual satisfaction and pleasure. Unfortunately, not all sex positions will give you what you desire in sex. The missionary position, for instance, is one of the oldest sex positions in history, which makes everything about it boring. Therefore, consider looking for another sex position and have the best sexual experience with your partner. However, go for something that will satisfy all your sexual fantasies and desires.


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