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You are Your Own Best Sex Partner

You are Your Own Best Sex Partner

  • by Jekaterina Gussarova
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You are Your Own Best Sex Partner

  • by Jekaterina Gussarova

Content Verification

Katie Lasson
Written by:
Katie Lasson
Sex and Relationship Adviser
Veronika Matutyte
Medically Reviewed by:
Veronika Matutyte
Medical Doctor
Barbara Santini
Fact Checked by:
Barbara Santini
Psychologist and Sex and Relationships Advisor

🥜 Key Points in a Nutshell 🥜

  • 💡 Unlock your true potential – Explore self-love and satisfaction.
  • 💫 Embrace the power of communication with your body and mind.
  • 🎉 A little bit of creativity can make all the difference in your intimate moments.
  • 🌙 Balance is key – take time for yourself and enjoy the process.
  • 🚀 Don’t rush it – let the experience evolve naturally.

✨ Key Advice & Tips from Our Experts ✨

  • 🔑 Experiment with different sensations to discover what feels best.
  • 💬 Don't be afraid to communicate your needs – your pleasure matters!
  • 🌿 Take time to relax, breathe deeply, and get into the right mindset.
  • 🕯️ Set the mood – the right ambiance can work wonders!
  • ✨ Remember, practice makes perfect – enjoy the journey, not just the destination.

Sex toys bring pleasure when used solo or with a partner. This article gives more tips on how to be your own best sex partner, including; setting the venue and material and using lubes.

Avoid being shy about self-love. When you look in the mirror and like the person in it so much that you want to have sex with them, that is a good sign. It means that you love yourself, and you find yourself sexy. You do not need anyone to help you enjoy sex. Having solo sex can also be good, if not better, than partnered sex. Being your own best partner involves stimulating and masturbating till you have an orgasm because you understand your body better. The following are some ideas for being your own best sex partner.

Set the Venue

Set the venue and the mood as you would if you were expecting a partner. Being your partner does not mean that you do not make plans to be with yourself. Have flowers and candles when using sex toys to masturbate, as Bacarr (2004) suggested. Have some soothing music. You could get some wine to help you relax. While relaxing, you should declutter your mind because you want to have some time; everything else should disappear. You can add some scents too.

Get Some Sex Toys

You may be ready to use your fingers, which is great too. You do not have to purchase toys to have a great time with yourself. You must have lube if you intend to have anything in your anus. If you intend to have some sex toys too, you will have to consider the following;

Where to Buy the Sex Toys

Buying sex toys comes with challenges to first-time users because anything sexual is stigmatized and should be kept hidden. You may opt to shop the sex toys at the sex toy shop or the online stores. Buying a sex toy at the shop is always the better option because it gives you a chance to ask all the questions you might have. Buying a sex toy online may be risky because you might lose your money to a fraudster and not be pleased with the delivered product. Consider the descriptions and reviews online to hint at how other shoppers feel about that product.

The Affordability

You need not go for the expensive sex toy, thinking they are the best quality. You may get disappointed. Some toys are expensive but not of the best quality. Cheap sex toys are usually not of the best quality. Purchase a sex toy that will be easy on your budget.

Settings

It is better to buy a toy with several settings than to have few or no settings. A sex toy with more settings can be more satisfying because you can control the settings until you get the sensation you want, as Bourne et al. (2014) suggested.

Portability

Consider understanding its power source to know if a sex toy is portable. While a sex toy is rechargeable, battery-charged, or cordless, you can carry it in your bag. That will be great news because you can take your sex with you for a trip and enjoy self-love everywhere.

Material

Knowing the material of a sex toy is important because it will guide you on how to use and clean it. It is also important to know the material so that you may know if the toy is safe or not safe for you. You can jump into the shower or bathtub with it if the sex toy is built of waterproof material. It should not come in contact with silicone lube because it erodes the silicon toy if the toy is made of silicone material. Park et al.(2022) noted that a silicone-based sex toy is safe for you because it is not porous, does not allow germs to breed, and is easy to clean. Materials such as jelly are porous and allow germs to breed in them and can, in turn, cause you to have infections.

Have Some Lube

Always have lube to reduce friction and have fun with your body. While there is a sexual adventure on your body you want but fear that it may be painful because of some friction, you only need to invest in lube for you to start your exploration. However, you should not insert anything in your anus without lube. The anus does not produce lubrication naturally like the vagina, and the tissue linings in it are too delicate to withstand friction. You may end up having injuries, as Hutcherson (2003) suggested. You should also avoid numbing lube because you will not be able to feel if you are hurting yourself.

Explore Your Body

Your body has other erogenous spots besides the ones based on your genitals. The ears, perineum, the skin. You can use a sex toy to try finding other ‘hot spots’ that you may have. You can also play with your genitals to find the parts that excite you the most when touched.

Change Positions

Changing positions is not for partnered play only. Some sensations are best felt in some positions than others. Consider taking the chance to stimulate your senses and discover what positions give you the most excitement.

Watch Some Porn

Porn is demonized because sex has been demonized. Some people believe that sex is dirty. There is nothing dirty about sex. It is natural to want bodily pleasure. You may watch porn, too, if you are having a hard time getting aroused. Most people cannot fail to get aroused while watching other people have sex. You can get some ideas from watching porn too.

Conclusion

Self-love is important in sex. loving yourself is not enough, and knowing what makes you happy is also important. You do not need a partner to know what pleases you. You should explore your body first so that when you meet your partner. You can guide them to please you. Knowing your sexual needs helps you know how to get them catered for. Knowing and understanding your body turns you into a great partner. Your partner will be the beneficiary of the sexual energy you send. When you love yourself, you love others, which is the attitude needed during sex.

References

Bacarr, J. (2004). The Japanese Art Of Sex: How To Tease, Seduce, And Pleasure The Samurai In Your Bedroom. Stone Bridge Press.

Bourne, A., Reid, D., Hickson, F., Torres Rueda, S., & Weatherburn, P. (2014). The Chemsex Study: Drug Use In Sexual Settings Among Gay And Bisexual Men In Lambeth, Southwark, And Lewisham.

Hutcherson, Hilda. What Your Mother Never Told You About Sex. Penguin, 2003.

Park, K., Yuk, H., Yang, M., Cho, J., Lee, H., & Kim, J. (2022). Using Electrical Impedance And Acoustic Tomography For Tactile Sensing, A Biomimetic Elastomeric Robot Skin. Science Robotics, 7(67), Eabm7187.


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