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How to Have More Passionate and Intimate Sex

How to Have More Passionate and Intimate Sex

Content Verification

Katie Lasson
Written by:
Katie Lasson
Sex and Relationship Adviser
Veronika Matutyte
Medically Reviewed by:
Veronika Matutyte
Medical Doctor
Barbara Santini
Fact Checked by:
Barbara Santini
Psychologist and Sex and Relationships Advisor

💖 Quickie Summary 💖

🔥 Passionate sex isn’t just for the movies – it's entirely achievable in your own boudoir!


🗣️ Communication is the ultimate aphrodisiac – talk, tease, and tantalise with words and whispers.


👀 Eye contact, slow touches, and playful anticipation turn up the heat naturally.


💃 Confidence is sexy – so strut, giggle, and own your glorious gorgeousness.


🧠 Intimacy starts outside the bedroom – so nurture that emotional spark too!

🎩 Tips from Our Saucy Experts 🎩

  • Set the mood before you hit the sheets – think candlelight, music, maybe even a cheeky blindfold.
  • Foreplay isn’t optional – it’s the main event in the theatre of touch.
  • Take your time – passionate sex isn’t a race, it’s a slow dance on silk sheets.
  • Explore fantasies together – you might be surprised what you both fancy.
  • Laugh, moan, whisper, and connect – sound is sexy and silence is overrated.

Think sex is just about bodies? Think again. Passionate and intimate sex is where the real magic happens. It’s not just skin-on-skin—it’s heart, soul, eye contact, and breathless connection rolled into one. You’re not just getting naked, you’re getting emotionally undressed too.

But here’s the thing—what makes sex intimate isn’t the same for everyone. For some, it’s a slow kiss. For others, it’s a shared laugh, a whispered fantasy, or a name moaned in the dark. The truth? Emotional intimacy in sex is personal, powerful, and oh-so-transformative.

Ready to go beyond the basics and build a real sexual connection with your partner? We’re talking deep emotional bonding, not just a quick roll in the sheets. These 17 passionate sex techniques will get you there—and then some.

Want to feel closer, sexier, and more connected in bed? Let’s begin.

What Makes Sex Intimate?

Sex can feel amazing, sure—but intimacy? That’s a whole different level. It’s less about friction and more about connection, emotion, and vulnerability.

Some people feel emotionally connected the second they touch someone. Others need time, trust, and the right kind of vibe. What makes sex intimate isn’t one-size-fits-all—it shifts depending on who you are and who you’re with. Sometimes it’s all about eye contact, and other times it’s about letting your guard down completely.

“Emotional connection during sex is built when both partners feel safe enough to be their full selves,” says Barbara Santini, psychologist and relationship advisor from Peaches and Screams. “That includes the messy parts—insecurities, fears, and the courage to ask for what you want.”

Sex without that emotional layer might still feel good—but it doesn’t always leave you feeling fulfilled. Vulnerability in bed makes the experience richer, deeper, and more lasting.

Tatyana Dyachenko, a sexual and relationship therapist, explains: “Real sexual bonding isn’t just about climax—it’s about presence, communication, and the willingness to connect.”

Think of intimacy like the glue that holds great sex together. It’s the eye contact that lingers, the soft laugh during foreplay, the way your bodies sync without saying a word. Intimate sex taps into both heart and body—igniting passion while building trust.

Katie Lasson, sex and relationship advisor, adds: “The most powerful kind of sex happens when both partners feel emotionally seen, not just physically touched.”

So, emotional intimacy and physical pleasure aren’t opposites—they’re partners in crime. When they work together, sparks fly.

17 Intensely Intimate Sex Techniques

Want to turn up the heat while getting emotionally closer? These techniques are designed to deepen connection and ignite chemistry.

Intimate sex isn’t about tricks or performance—it’s about trust, presence, and letting your guard down. These 17 passionate sex tips will help you embrace vulnerability, build emotional intimacy, and keep the spark alive.

Embrace Vulnerability in the Bedroom

Vulnerability in bed is about letting yourself be seen, flaws and all. That includes showing your desires, insecurities, and real reactions. Don’t hide behind the lights-off, shirt-on version of sex. Get real, get raw, and get connected.

Maintain Deep Eye Contact

Eyes are powerful—like a window into your soul, cheesy as that sounds. Maintaining eye contact during sex boosts emotional connection instantly. It makes you feel seen, wanted, and present in the moment. Don’t underestimate a good gaze—it’s seriously sexy.

Kiss Often and Meaningfully

A long, slow kiss can say more than a hundred words. Kissing isn’t just foreplay; it’s emotional glue. Let it linger, vary the pace, and stay connected through your lips. The intimacy of a proper snog shouldn’t be reserved for Hollywood.

Explore Oral Pleasure Together

Oral sex can be one of the most intimate touchpoints in the bedroom. It’s about trust, vulnerability, and mutual giving. When you take your time, it becomes more than just stimulation—it’s a way to honour your partner’s body. Add eye contact or words of praise for even deeper bonding.

Try Sensate Focus Touching

Sensate focus is like mindful touching—it takes pressure off performance and shifts it to pure connection. Use soft strokes, no expectations, just exploration. Touch becomes a conversation, not a goal. It’s ideal for building trust and sexual bonding.

Engage in Full Body Contact

More skin equals more connection. Press your chest to theirs, wrap your arms around each other, intertwine your legs. Physical closeness sends emotional signals too. Aim to always be touching in two or more places—it keeps the intimacy alive.

Give Each Other Sensual Massages

A sensual massage relaxes the body and opens the door to emotional intimacy. Use warm oil, dim lights, and soft touches. This isn't about racing to sex—it’s about slowing down and enjoying every inch. A well-placed touch can spark deep emotional connection.

Prioritise Your Partner’s Pleasure

Passionate sex should never be one-sided. Focus on what your partner likes, ask questions, give and receive equally. It shows emotional investment, not just physical interest. Intimacy grows when both people feel desired, seen, and satisfied.

Say “I Love You” During Sex

If you mean it, say it. Whisper it, moan it, shout it—whatever fits the mood. Saying “I love you” adds emotional depth and reassurance. It makes sex feel like more than just movement—it becomes a shared experience.

Experience Condomless Sex Safely

For many couples, sex without a condom feels more raw, intimate, and emotionally charged. If you're in a committed relationship and tested, it can heighten that feeling of unity. Feeling your partner cum inside you (a creampie) can feel deeply connecting. Always prioritise consent, comfort, and safety.

Use Each Other’s Names Lovingly

There’s something powerful about hearing your name in the heat of the moment. It roots you in the experience. Using names brings attention, intimacy, and emotional presence. It's a small change that creates a big impact.

Hold Hands during Intimate Moments

It might sound sweet or silly, but holding hands during sex keeps the emotional thread alive. It’s a small but mighty gesture. Intertwine fingers when things get hot, or when you’re close to climax. That tender grip says, “I’m here, with you.”

Laugh, Talk and Be Playful Together

Sex doesn’t need to be all candles and serious faces. Giggle, tease, talk—it keeps things light, real, and connected. Playfulness makes room for personality and helps drop emotional walls. Passion grows when you can be silly and sexy together.

Share Sexual Fantasies Openly

Want next-level emotional intimacy? Share what turns you on behind closed eyes. Telling each other fantasies builds trust and deepens sexual connection. It’s brave, revealing, and seriously hot when done right.

Slow Down and Savour Every Touch

Fast and rough has its place—but slow sex is pure magic for intimacy. Linger with each kiss. Touch slowly. Move your hips in a circle, not a race. When you slow down, you both get to feel everything.

Cuddle after Sex for Emotional Closeness

Don’t just roll over and scroll your phone—stay connected. Cuddling after sex increases oxytocin, the bonding hormone. Lie on their chest, stroke their hair, share a sigh. It’s a soft landing after all that intensity.

Enjoy Pillow Talk and Stay Present

That sleepy, tender chat after sex? That’s pillow talk, and it’s gold. Talk about how it felt, share a joke, or simply breathe together. Staying present after sex lets the emotional connection really sink in.

Intimate Sex Positions to Try

Sometimes it’s not what you’re doing—it’s how close you feel while doing it. The right sex position can seriously boost emotional connection and intimacy in bed.

Intimate sex positions allow for more eye contact, gentle touch, and full-body closeness. They’re less about performance and more about presence—perfect for partners who want to feel with each other, not just on each other.

  • Missionary: Classic for a reason. Face-to-face, loads of eye contact, and room for slow, sensual movement.
  • Cowgirl: You’re in control, but still close. Great for kissing, holding hands, and mutual pleasure.
  • Lotus: You sit in his lap, legs wrapped around, foreheads touching. It’s physically tight and emotionally intense.
  • Spooning: Lying on your sides with him behind you. Perfect for soft touches, whispering, and breathing in sync.
  • Face-to-Face Seated: Sit on the edge of the bed, wrap your legs around him, and stay heart-to-heart.

These sex positions are built for more than just climax—they’re made for connection. Try slowing down, maintaining eye contact during sex, and noticing every point of contact. That’s where intimacy lives.

The Truth about Simultaneous Orgasm

Let’s get one thing straight—simultaneous orgasms are not the holy grail of sex. The media loves to romanticise them, but in real life? They're rare, unpredictable, and honestly, not the only way to feel close.

Sex without pressure is far more enjoyable than chasing some perfect “movie moment.” When you’re focused on timing, you miss the magic of the moment. Emotional intimacy in sex isn’t measured by shared orgasms—it’s about shared presence, pleasure, and connection.

Katie Lasson, a sex and relationship advisor, puts it plainly: “You don’t need a perfectly synced orgasm to feel perfectly connected.”

Instead of stressing over the finish line, focus on the journey—gentle touches, honest reactions, deep breathing, and emotional closeness. Let orgasms come naturally (or not), and give yourself permission to simply enjoy.

What Gets In The Way of Intimate Sex?

So you’re craving closeness but feeling distant in the bedroom? You’re not alone—barriers to intimacy are more common than most couples admit.

Sometimes, your hormones have other plans. Mood swings, menstrual cycles, and energy dips can mess with your desire for connection. Your body might be up for it, but your mind’s on a completely different page.

Mental health and medication can also kill the vibe. Antidepressants, anxiety, or emotional numbness can make sex feel robotic or joyless. When your head’s cloudy, it’s hard to feel present, let alone passionate.

Then there’s emotional unavailability—or just a lack of real communication. If you’re not talking, not listening, or just going through the motions, intimacy disappears fast. You can’t fake connection, and silence in or out of bed only widens the gap.

Selfish lovers? They ruin everything. A partner who doesn't care about your pleasure can make sex feel hollow. If they’re not responsive, giving, or emotionally tuned in, it quickly becomes one-sided and disconnected.

And let’s not ignore relationship stress. Unresolved arguments, resentment, or feeling unloved can bleed into your sex life. When the bond outside the bedroom is broken, intimacy inside it takes the hit.

The Bottom Line

Maybe it’s feeling like something’s missing—like the spark’s fizzled or the connection’s gone quiet. That’s normal. It doesn’t mean the passion’s dead—it means it’s ready to evolve. Intimacy isn’t a fixed thing; it grows when nurtured with trust, openness, and a bit of bravery. These techniques aren’t just tips—they’re tools to build sexual connection, reignite desire, and deepen emotional closeness. Start trying them today and rediscover the kind of passionate and intimate sex that leaves hearts full and bodies buzzing.

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