Types of Submissives in BDSM with Examples & Ideas
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📌 Quick & Kinky Summary 📌
- 🖤 Submissives come in all flavours—from bratty to devoted, there's a role for everyone!
- 🔥 Communication is key—express boundaries, desires, and safe words.
- 🎭 Experimentation is encouraged—try different roles and dynamics to find your perfect match.
- 💬 Trust and consent are EVERYTHING—always prioritise safety and respect.
💡 Expert Tips & Naughty Know-How 💡
✨ Know thyself: Understanding your submissive style helps create fulfilling experiences.
✨ Negotiate boundaries: Even the kinkiest play should have clear rules.
✨ Trust your partner: A strong Dominant-submissive bond is built on mutual respect.
✨ Aftercare matters: Cuddles, hydration, and check-ins keep the experience positive.
Ever wondered why some submissives talk back, while others kneel in quiet obedience? The world of BDSM submission isn’t just about following orders—it’s a spectrum of desires, personalities, and play styles.
From cheeky brat submissives who love pushing buttons to service subs who find joy in pleasing, every submissive role has its own unique appeal. Some love pain, some crave pampering, and others hand over complete control. Understanding these differences isn’t just fun—it’s key to building stronger, more fulfilling BDSM dynamics.
So, whether you're exploring your own submission or figuring out what kind of sub suits your partner, you're in the right place. By the end of this guide, you’ll have a clear grasp of the 10 most common types of submissives—with examples and ideas for each.Ready to dive in? Let’s begin.
What is a Submissive in BDSM?
Submission in BDSM isn’t just about following orders or giving up control—it’s about desire, trust, and personal expression. Some submissives thrive on obedience and discipline, while others love pushing boundaries or serving their dominant in unique ways. No two submissives are the same, and that’s what makes BDSM dynamics so diverse and exciting.
Barbara Santini, a psychologist and relationship advisor from Peaches and Screams, explains:
"Submission in BDSM is a deeply psychological experience. For some, it's about feeling protected, while for others, it’s an escape from daily responsibilities. It isn’t about weakness—true submission is a conscious choice, rooted in trust and mutual understanding."
That’s why submission isn’t a "one-size-fits-all" concept. Some submissives love pain, some prefer affection, and others crave strict control.
A bottom enjoys receiving sensations but doesn’t necessarily submit outside a scene. A submissive willingly gives up control to their partner, but still maintains personal boundaries. A slave, however, is fully devoted—often in a 24/7 dynamic where the dominant has complete power.Submission is as personal as it is powerful—it’s all about what feels right for you.
The 10 Common Types of Submissives
Not all submissives fit the same mould. Some playfully resist, some serve with devotion, and others seek intense physical sensations. Understanding these different submissive archetypes can help you navigate your BDSM journey, whether you're discovering your own submission or learning about a partner’s needs.
Let’s explore the 10 most common types of submissives—each with unique behaviours, desires, and dynamics.
Submissive Brat
Brat submissives are feisty, mischievous, and love to test limits. They don’t submit easily—instead, they push their dominant’s buttons, craving playful resistance and discipline. But make no mistake, they still desire control and structure—they just want to earn attention by being cheeky.
Katie Lasson, a sex and relationship advisor, explains:
"Brats challenge authority, but it's a game—they love a dominant who can put them in their place. It’s about playful defiance, not disrespect. For them, submission is an earned dynamic, filled with teasing and playful struggles."
Brats thrive in brat tamer dynamics, where their Dom enjoys the challenge of keeping them in check.Examples of brat behaviour include Talking back, disobeying small orders, and resisting restraint in a playful way.
Service Submissive
Service subs find pleasure in serving their dominant. They gain fulfilment from acts of service—domestic, personal, or sexual. Their submission isn’t about being controlled; it’s about pleasing their Dom through dedication and efficiency.
Tatyana Dyachenko, a sexual and relationship therapist, notes:
"For service submissives, obedience is expressed through action. They feel valued when they contribute—whether it’s through housework, care giving, or sexual service. Their devotion is measured by how well they anticipate and meet their Dom’s needs."
Service submission varies from simple domestic tasks to formal contracts and rituals in more structured BDSM relationships. Examples of service sub behaviour include Cooking, cleaning, preparing a bath, refilling drinks and planning events.
Submissive Princess
A submissive princess wants to be adored, cherished, and treated like royalty. She submits only when she feels worshipped and appreciated. Unlike a brat, she doesn’t misbehave to get attention—she expects it naturally.
These submissives don’t lack respect for their Dom; they just believe they deserve the best treatment. A dominant who enjoys spoiling and controlling their partner is the perfect match for them.Examples of princess behaviour include Expecting pampering, pouting for attention and loving affectionate dominance.
Bottom
Not all bottoms are submissive. Some enjoy sensory stimulation but don’t desire control exchange. They might love pain, impact play, or bondage, but they set their own limits and take charge after a session.
Unlike true submissives, bottoms don’t crave power dynamics. Their main focus is experiencing physical sensations without needing to obey orders or maintain submission outside of play.Examples of bottom behaviour include Receiving spankings, bondage, sensual play and negotiating scene limits.
Masochist
Masochists get pleasure from pain, sometimes to extreme levels. But pain doesn’t always equal submission—some masochists aren’t interested in power exchange at all.
They may enjoy spanking, flogging, knife play, fire play, or more extreme forms of pain. For some, pain is a cathartic release, while for others, it’s purely pleasurable.Examples of masochist behaviour include Asking for more pain, trying intense kinks and loving physical punishments.
Smart-Ass Masochist (SAM)
A SAM is like a brat, but with a strong love for pain. They push their dominant’s buttons not just for attention, but because they enjoy the punishments that follow.
SAMs thrive on sarcasm, defiance, and playful disobedience, knowing it will result in rougher treatment. They often only reveal their cheeky side to their Dom, keeping up a “good” appearance in public.Examples of SAM behaviour include Teasing their Dom, making sarcastic remarks and provoking punishments.
Break Me Submissive
Unlike brats or SAMs, break me submissives don’t just tease their dominant—they physically resist them. They crave being “overpowered”, loving the struggle before finally submitting.
This type of submission is often part of primal play, where a dominant pins, chases, or restrains their sub. The submissive enjoys the thrill of fighting back—but only with a Dom strong enough to “break” them.Examples of break me sub behaviour include Resisting being restrained, running from their Dom, fighting back during play.
Model Submissive
Model submissives love looking good and being admired. Their submission is aesthetic and performative—they enjoy the visual aspects of BDSM, from dressing in latex to posing in bondage.
Some only enjoy the look of submission, without fully engaging in D/s relationships. Others are both aesthetic and obedient. Either way, they prioritise presentation and beauty in their submission.Examples of model submissive behaviour include Wearing BDSM outfits, posing for photos, avoiding marks that ruin appearance.
BDSM Slave
A slave takes submission to the extreme. Unlike regular submissives, slaves often commit to Total Power Exchange (TPE), where they surrender all control to their dominant.
Slavery in BDSM is about deep trust, absolute obedience, and full-time submission. Many slaves follow strict rules, sometimes including contracts that outline their role.Examples of BDSM slave behaviour include Asking permission for daily tasks, obeying without question, surrendering control completely.
Pet Submissive
Pet submissives engage in animal role play, enjoying the experience of being trained, controlled, and cared for like a pet. Common forms include puppy play, kitten play, and pony play.
Many pet subs wear collars, use leashes, and respond to commands. They often find comfort in non-verbal submission, using body language and animal sounds instead of words.Examples of pet submissive behaviour include Wearing collars, moving on all fours, eating from a bowl, responding to commands.
Choosing the Right Submissive Role
Finding your ideal submissive role isn’t about fitting into a box—it’s about self-exploration, communication, and trust. Submission should feel natural, fulfilling, and exciting, not like something you’re forcing yourself into.
Katie Lassonexplains:
"Exploring submission is a journey, not a fixed destination. Trying different roles helps you understand what excites you, what feels safe, and what truly satisfies your desires. The key is open communication and a willingness to experiment."
Start by testing different submissive styles, setting boundaries, and discussing expectations with your Dom. BDSM contracts can help define rules, limits, and responsibilities, ensuring that both partners feel safe and respected.
At the end of the day, submission is as unique as the person experiencing it—so explore, experiment, and most importantly, enjoy the process.
The Bottom Line
There’s a lot to take in, isn’t there? Maybe there’s excitement bubbling up, a sense of curiosity, or even nervous anticipation. That’s normal—submission isn’t just about control, it’s about discovery, trust, and self-acceptance.
This guide has laid out the 10 most common submissive roles, showing that submission is deeply personal. Whether drawn to service, playful rebellion, or deep surrender, there’sa space where everything clicks.
The journey doesn’t end here—explore, experiment, embrace it all. Because the right kind of submission? It’s not just thrilling—it’s transformational.