GETTING STARTED WITH A GOLDEN SHOWER AND PEE PLAY

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Written by:✓

Tatyana Dyachenko
Psychologist and Relationship Adviser

Medically Reviewed by:✓

Veronika Matutyte
Medical Doctor

Fact Checked by:✓

Katie Lasson
Sex and Relationship Adviser

Golden shower and pee play is a sexual play that involves urinating on your partner. Some of the ways you can get started include; discussing with your partner, planning how it will be, having a safe word, and aftercare.

When it comes to sexual activities, people have different fetishes. Some people will boldly shame or judge those into golden showers or pee. However, what works for you might not work for another person. Some may be against the fetishes because it does not work for them, or they do not find anything exciting or fun about the whole issue. One of the most common fetishes involves one person urinating on their partner. So, how do you get started with golden showers and pee play?

Discuss With Your Partner 

You should first discuss it with your partner and get to know if it is something they are comfortable with. Do not force it on them but rather get to see their reaction to the whole topic. You should first get her consent before trying it out. You will discuss who will be the dominant and who will be the receiver. You can also discuss where they will pee on you. Each time you want to explore the pee play, you should inform them. Just because you are having fun with the whole experience, it does not mean you have to pee on them as a surprise. They may get turned off easily.

Plan It Out

You should discuss what you plan to do and where you plan to do it with your partner. You can do it in the shower, bathtub, bed, or floor. It is all upon you to choose. Ideally, the bathroom seems to be the best place where you can explore this game. Playing it on the bed may put stains on the bed that will be hard to remove or may not even get out. The bathtub seems ideal because it has drainage where the pee will pass through. There is also the availability of enough water to wash off once you are done with the pee play. Some of the tips that you can have to plan it out include;

Consent

According to Rosten (2019), it is important to ensure your partner is down to the whole play and has agreed to try it out. If they are unwilling, do not force it on them.

Drink a Lot of Water

Before the whole pee play, drink a lot of water. This will make you have enough urine for the pee play.

Take Flavored Fruits  

It will be disgusting if the pee comes out with an awful smell. Avoid sour fruits, and instead, eat fruits such as berries or pineapples. You can also try flavored sweeteners.

Be Patient  

You should have patience with yourself and your partner. The pee can take some time to come out. Your partner may also not be in the mood to try the pee play when you intend to play. You can give her time to process it and continue when she is ready.

Safety

Pee contains some bacteria that may cause skin infections. Check if your partner is healthy before peeing on them. Avoid peeing on open wounds because it may cause irritations and infections. Also, you should avoid peeing in your partner’s mouth for safety.

Stick To the Agreement

Do not go against what you had agreed with your partner. If you had planned to pee on her in a particular place like the stomach, keep your word. Do not splash your pee on your partner's whole body if that was not the agreement. Sticking to the agreement and keeping your word will make your partner trust you, and they will want to experience the pee play whenever you want.

Have a Safe Word

You can start by peeing on your partner’s soft spot. The first spot can be the stomach. You can then move to the chest or the breast. Sometimes it can get uncomfortable, and you may want to stop the whole play. Doshi (2015) suggested having a non-verbal signal or a word that you can use for your partner to know that the whole pee play needs to stop. You can choose words such as berries or pineapple. If it gets uncomfortable or irritating, tell your partner.

Aftercare or Clean Up

The dominant is always in charge of the whole pee play. Bennett, T. (2018) noted that aftercare after any BDSM  play is important. After the dom is done peeing on the sub, they should show that they care about their partner. Leaving them with pee all over their bodies and cleaning up after yourself sounds selfish. It may have been an exciting experience, but the fact that you seemed not to care about the person can put them off, and they may not want to try it again. They can start by washing off the pee from the partner's body. They can gently sensually caress their body, take a bath together, apply oil on them and cuddle and embrace each other later.   

Rehydrate

After the pee play, it is advisable to consume a lot of water. This will help you to recover the lost water during pee play. If you fail to take in some water, you will become dehydrated and sick.

Conclusion

Pee play is generally a raunchy and sexual experience. It mostly happens in the shower or the bathtub. People mostly shame it because it seems like a dirty and messy fetish. It makes no sense for one to shame another person because people have different fetishes. If you are into it, there is no shame in it. Get a partner who will not judge you, and get ready to have some fun. It is okay to try out different sexual activities, and if pee play is what tickles your fancy, then it is okay. However, have it with a person who you fully trust.

References

Bennett, T. (2018). “Unorthodox Rules”: The Instructive Potential of BDSM Consent for Law. Journal of Positive Sexuality, 4(1), 4-11.

Doshi, Sunil M. "BDSM: a Sexual Deviance Rather a Sexual Culture an Overview." Journal of Indian Academy of Forensic Medicine 37, no. 1 (2015): 78-81.Rosten, M. G. (2019). Cultivating Ethical Negotiations or Fetishising Consent in BDSM?. In Rape in the Nordic Countries (pp. 33-48). Routledge.