INITIATING SPONTANEOUS SURPRISE SEX
Surprise your partner by introducing new sexual acts in and out of the bedroom to heighten your sensation.
Couples who have been together for long may sometimes experience changes in their sexual energy. Although some people may not plan for sex every day and only have it after a while, others plan for sex dates earlier, and sex for them becomes a routine.
There is nothing wrong with planning for sex ahead of time. Prior planning provides people with enough time to get physically and emotionally ready. However, the element of surprise is a concept that could spice up your sex life.
Why Surprises are So Thrilling
The brain goes through different phases when people are surprised. People first freeze, followed by some curiosity, and their thoughts and feelings change. With these steps, emotions become intensified to about 400 percent. Since spontaneous sex is surprising, people may also experience more joy, arousal, and happiness. Additionally, they may experience a blissful wave of dopamine because of the activation of the pleasure centers in the brain.
Therefore, even for people who are not into surprises because they don't like being vulnerable, getting surprises is the best way to live a life full of joy and intense emotions, especially in their sexual life.
Importance of Surprise in a Relationship
Research done by Irene Tsapelas proves that surprise is a perfect way to spice up a relationship. This study was done on 125 married couples and took over nine years to develop the results. The conclusion was that couples who get bored in a relationship tend to be unhappy, which lessens the bond between the partners.
In another study conducted by Helen Fisher, a professional researcher at Rutgers University in the anthropology department, PET scanners were used to conduct research on the factor of surprise. The research findings were that the brain is linked to satisfaction and reward. This means the feelings each partner develops at the beginning of a relationship can be maintained if they implement the element of surprise. This is because the brain produces a lot of dopamine when one is surprised. Fisher also suggested that couples do exciting things together and engage in sex regularly.
8 Ways to Incorporate Spontaneous Surprise Sex
Don't Plan for Anything
Most men consider spontaneous sex an important intimacy factor. In the same view, most women also prefer spontaneous sex instead of planned rampage. Therefore, instead of having a specific date, couples should incorporate a surprise element in their sex life.
You can try out a 'dessert' after an at-home dinner or pay a surprise visit to the other person's workplace for an afternoon delight.
Be Unpredictable in public.
While driving home with your partner, you can turn on the side of the road for a secluded session or do other unpredictable things when out in public with your partner. However, you should be careful with this so as not to attract attention or get caught.
Sleep Surprise
Waking up your partner with a kiss or sex may be the best way to start their morning.
Change Passive into Active
Any passive partner should flip the roles once in a while for increased fun. It must not be a grand gesture. However, if you want to go big, unexpectedly turn up in one of your roleplaying outfits or sexy lingerie.
Try New Things
Being spontaneous does not necessarily mean initiating sex. It can also be surprising your partner with a new act during sex. If you know specific sexual acts that intrigue your partner or that they have a kink or fetish you've never explored, try to incorporate it during your sexy moment. This will blow their minds.
Communicate
Although it sounds counterintuitive, a romantic surprise can be well-received when you are sure that the other partner will love it more. Communicate to your partner about your fantasies, sexual curiosities, and specific limits, and allow them to take charge of your next fun session.
Include Props and Toys
Using sex props and toys in your sexual activities will give you mind-blowing effects. Different sex toys can be worn by one of the partners, or you may try light BDSM play between trusted partners.
Change the Scene
Consider switching it up if you are both used to having sex in one place, like the bedroom. Take a trip or visit a hotel for a night. This takes you and your partner from your usual comfort, making you enjoy more adventurous sex together.