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8 VITAL BDSM RULES TO KEEP IT SAFE, SANE & CRAZY-KINKY

8 VITAL BDSM RULES TO KEEP IT SAFE, SANE & CRAZY-KINKY

8 VITAL BDSM RULES TO KEEP IT SAFE, SANE & CRAZY-KINKY

Do you want to introduce BDSM play in your relationship, and you are not conversant with the rules? Here are vital rules to keep safe, sane and crazy kinky, including using safe words, recognizing the risks, communicating, respecting boundaries, patience, incorporating aftercare, etc.

BDSM community includes numerous games, including bondage plays. It is one of the games you will find pleasurable and intense. Exploring different fantasies and pleasures is essential for spicing up things in your sex life. Learn more about BDSM before engaging in it. BDSM comes with numerous rules and boundaries that will prevent both parties from injuries and extreme pain during the play. The more you realize these rules, the better. Communication and honesty are also essential to any relationship. Consider conversing with your partner before introducing BDSM into your relationship. The lack of knowledge, especially when it comes to bondage play, can potentially hurt both parties. A couple should be careful whenever they introduce BDSM into their relationship. Consider following BDSM rules if you are after safe and secure play. 

Why You Need Rules 

BDSM games are usually portrayed as dangerous. However, some can be safe and secure for everyone. The rules are meant to prevent you from any harm during bondage games. You cannot always be careful whenever you are in BDSM scenes; you need these rules to protect you. It is essential to research and have enough preparation before venturing into BDSM. This will allow you to enjoy safe and comfortable bondage play. Dunkley & Brotto (2020) suggested that you could establish BDSM rules to help minimize the risks allowing you to experience pleasurable and intense bondage play. 

Different BDSM Rules 

Below is a complete guide with BDSM rules that will help you learn how to do the right things during BDSM scenes to stay safe. 

Recognize the Risks 

While entering a BDSM scene, you must understand the risks before trying out any play. This alerts you of what is awaiting. You need to keep in mind three ideas whenever you are playing the bondage games. They include;

  • SSC – Safe Sane and Consensual 
  • RACK – Risk Aware Consensual Kink 
  • Hurt not Harm

Use Safe Words 

BDSM plays require a sub to use safe words. There are numerous words you can always consider using with your partner to enjoy safe and comfortable bondage play. Use simple words that can be remembered easily when the game intensifies. You can choose words like yellow (pause), red (stop), and green (start). 

Do Not Play Under the Influence 

Do not risk your life by playing other people's roles. Consider researching what you are getting yourself into before involving even your partner. You should not follow anyone's guide on bondage. It is about you and your safety. Also, consider being sober whenever you enter into a BDSM scene. This will prevent you from any injuries. 

Communicate Openly and Honestly

Communication is an essential element in any relationship. Communication is a tool in the BDSM scene, like normal sexual activities. It is something you can never omit, especially when venturing into BDSM world for the first time. BDSM scenes come with dangerous games you might never want to try. Consider discussing it with your partner before introducing bondage plays in your relationship. It is not something everyone will be pleased with even if you bring the subject. This is where agreement is essential between couples. This allows you to do things comfortably without any challenges or fear. You can check out the complete guide to sexual communication. This will help you find the right tips on converse with your partner without misunderstanding. According to Bezreh et al. (2012), mature and healthy communication will prevent you from danger when you appear in the BDSM scene for the first time. 

Be Patient Open, Humble, and Realistic 

BDSM scenes are not soft as any sexual activities you engage in. Most of the games are dangerous and need patience. Being patient with your partner prevents you from injuries, especially when dealing with dangerous bondage tools. Having unrealistic expectations when in the BDSM scene is not right. Start slowly, especially when engaging in impact play. This allows you to enjoy a safe and comfortable BDSM experience. 

Know-How to Use Your Tools

Different tools in the BDSM scene are designed for different purposes. Knowing how and where to use them is essential. The tools for BDSM play include floggers, paddlers, spankers, whips, and canes (Newmahr, 2010). Bondage gears are designed perfectly to offer smooth play. They include bondage masks, hoods, cuffs, collars, gags, spreader bars, tapes, and blinders. You can also play with other tools, including knives, needles, vibrators & dildos, violet wands, fucking machines, bondage furniture, blindfolds, and candlewax. These tools might look strange to you, but you must learn to use each to prevent you from any danger during the BDSM scene. 

Prepare for the Worst 

Preparation for the worst is essential in any BDSM scene. You are unsure what your partner might bring to you, especially when using blindfolds. Being prepared is a critical BDSM rule. It includes;

  • Treating any bruises immediately after the scene.
  • Have a first aid kit around whenever you are in a BDSM scene.
  • Wearing gloves and condoms prevent you from direct body contact that might allow your body to mix. 
  • Keeping hydrated.
  • Have two pairs of keys whenever you use cock cages for an emergency. 
  • Never leave your bounded partner alone.

Incorporate Aftercare 

Aftercare is the last BDSM rule you need to consider whenever you are involved in any bondage game. It is not only essential after BDSM scenes, but to other sexual activities like intercourse. Aftercare is about treating your partner emotionally and physically after the end of the scene (Bennett, 2018). This act is recommended to help build your connection as a couple. You can consider applying antibiotics or balm to the most affected areas to provide relief. Other things you can consider doing to your partner after the BDSM scene include taking a warm shower, massaging, or cuddling. 

Conclusion

BDSM is a dangerous sexual play. A couple should learn the rules in BDSM before engaging in one to avoid injuries during the play. You can enjoy BDSM plays with your partner if you agree and communicate effectively while in the scene.

References

Bennett, T. (2018). "Unorthodox Rules": The Instructive Potential Of BDSM Consent For Law. Journal Of Positive Sexuality, 4(1), 4-11.

 Bezreh, T., Weinberg, T. S., & Edgar, T. (2012). BDSM Disclosure And Stigma Management: Identifying Opportunities For Sex Education. American Journal Of Sexuality Education, 7(1), 37-61.

Dunkley, C. R., & Brotto, L. A. (2020). The Role Of Consent In The Context Of BDSM. Sexual Abuse, 32(6), 657-678.Newmahr, S. (2010). Rethinking Kink: Sadomasochism As Serious Leisure. Qualitative Sociology, 33(3), 313-331.

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