12 PITFALLS OF SEX + WHY YOU SHOULD DO IT ANYWAY
Casual sex can be enjoyable but the pitfalls that can come from it include unplanned pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, guilt and regret, sexual assault and drug use.
Casual sex is a consensual sexual activity that has no commitment. According to Fielder & Carey (2010), casual sex, also known as hookups, are sexual interactions between people who do not want a romantic commitment. Simply put, it is just sex. People feel the urge to have physical intimacy and they engage in it. Casual sex does not always involve sexual intercourse. It may involve kissing, oral sex, and masturbation. Casual sex can be enjoyable because you can engage in it without emotional baggage that are tied to serious romantic relationships and marriages. The following are 12 reasons why casual sex may be very dangerous;
Unplanned Pregnancy
According to McIlhaney & Bush (2008), casual sex may lead to unwanted pregnancies. It is unlikely that anyone would want to have casual sex to get pregnant. There is a high chance you had sex with your significant other because you only needed some sexual pleasure out of it. Women involved in casual sex may be using birth control methods. However, no birth control is 100% effective. Dry humping can get a woman pregnant even with her underwear on. You do not need penetration to conceive. Getting pregnant when you thought you were keen on birth-control or when you thought that you could not get pregnant from just petting can be traumatizing because that means you need to involve the one person with whom you did not want to have a serious relationship with. Pregnancy after casual sex is not tough for women only. It haunts men too. The man was probably seeking for sex only while married, and that pregnancy will change his family structure. Casual sex has led to murders of women to hide pregnancy. It may also lead to abortion, divorce, and child support cases.
Stigmatization
Having casual sex is a taboo. Conservative people do not condone casual sex. The people known to involve in casual sex are usually looked down upon and judged by others.
Sexually Transmitted Diseases
One can contract sexually transmitted diseases such as genital herpes from casual sex. This is because casual sex usually involves having intercourse with someone whose sexual history you are not familiar with. Most people are overwhelmed by the thought of sexual pleasure and may not disclose their health status. Besides the person they are having sex with is most probably a random person whom they’ll never meet again. Some people have casual sex with several partners making it hard tracking where they got the disease from. The unfortunate side in all this is that they will probably continue having unprotected casual sex and infect more people. However, condoms do not protect you from sexually transmitted infections such as herpes, genital warts and syphilis which can be spread from skin- to- skin contact.
Unrequited Love
You may want to have a private relationship for sex only but your partner may be hoping for something more. The partner may be hoping that the casual sex will evolve into a relationship. Unrequited love can be very dangerous leading to fatal consequences as the other party forces a relationship out of something that was meant to be casual. They may demand commitment and devotion. Unrequited love can cause jealousy, possessiveness and obsession. Casual sex is meant for fun devoid of all the components that are found in a full-fledged relationship.
Objectification Of People
People who have casual sex view others as potential sex objects; people they can only have sex with. For that reason, they do not value other people’s relationship.
Low Self-esteem
People yearn to be valued and loved. If you keep on having casual sex, it will bother you that most people with whom you interact with only want to have sex with you but not to get into relationships. This can affect your self-esteem because you will feel as if you are not good enough to be in a committed relationship.
Careless Sex
Having casual sex makes sex seem a separate entity from intimacy that should be enjoyed in relationships and marriages. This leads to fornication, prostitution and adultery.
Trauma
If the person has casual sex for the first time, it may have a traumatic effect because the first experience should be gentle, not only physically, but also emotionally.
Guilt and Regret
Casual sex has three stages – the before, after and future. Before sex, the person’s judgement is clouded and driven by lust. The person just wants to get involved in sex and does not care about the consequences. After sex the person is relieved and thankful. Some may feel guilt at this stage. In the future, the person may regret if he/she is haunted by casual sex. It comes in the form of pregnancy, a sexually transmitted illness or an infidelity being exposed and hence divorce.
Sexual Assault
Sexual assault happens when someone is touched or involved in a sexual activity without their consent. If you presented yourself as someone who is sexually liberal, you just might attract sexual predators. This does not mean that people who are open about their sexual desires with “no strings attached” deserve to be sexually assaulted. The fact is people who engage in casual sex tend to be exposed to many sexual partners and hence attract more sexual partners.
Drug Use
Most people having casual sex are usually under the influence of some drug. These drugs seem to induce sexual pleasure, boost confidence and also remove shame and conscience. The drugs eventually lead to addiction and can have fatal consequences.
Conclusion
Casual sex can be good for you. It can be relaxing, pleasurable and can guard you against mental health problems such as stress and anxiety. Moreover, it can help you explore your sexual world to know what you like or do not like. However, we should approach casual sex with caution because an episode of pleasure can end up being a negative life-changing experience.
References
Fielder, R. L., & Carey, M. P. (2010). Predictors and consequences of sexual “hookups” among college students: A short-term prospective study. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 39(5), 1105-1119.
McIlhaney Jr, J. S., & Bush, F. M. (2008). Hooked: New science on how casual sex is affecting our children. Moody Publishers.