Erotic Holidays: Carefree Cruises

By Elena Ognivtseva

If you thought that Mediterranean cruises were all about old folks and shuffleboards: think again. Forget about giant chess and captain’s dinner dances… these cruises are all about relaxing in a Jacuzzi, dining in the buff, and being steered to shore by a nudist crew who are there to get you in the mood.

Book a cruise holiday through Shoes Only Travel and you’ll learn to “expose yourself to adventure” – double-entendre intended! Enjoy an erotic adventure including on-board swingers parties, “ménage a Mediterranean” style and cruise from port to port as you enjoy the sights and swinging fun from Bali to, ahem, Bangkok. They promise unusual locations and unique events available only to those discerning clients who wish to travel light – with shoes only.

There are plenty of other cruise providers too. Book a holiday away with Tryst Travel, enjoy your heart’s desires with Global Fantasies or enjoy a clothing-optional soiree at Desire Cruises. Whatever your fancy, there are a few basic etiquette rules when enjoying a swingers cruise or erotic holiday au natural:

Wear clothes when dining.

This is a big one: nobody wants to see your bits and pieces while they’re nibbling on their bratwurst, or wobbling their jelly for dessert. Tuck them away and cover up for dinner time so that your fellow cruises can enjoy a clean and hygienic dining environment. After all, you can always skip dinner and go straight to the delectable desserts if you choose!

The staff are not fair game, unless explicitly stated.

Many erotic cruises or sexy holidays come pre-packed with a companion who is booked for a very specific period – but that’s where the buck stops. The cabin crew and staff are off-limits for the duration of your visit, even if they’re openly flirting with you. Unless you receive explicit permission from the organisers of the event, don’t try to bed the barman or he might lose his job.

When in port, au natural should be “act natural”.

While the cruises and resorts are clothing optional, remember to pack in your pants and other attire for when you’re sightseeing at destinations or simply enjoying the view in port. Your au natural look is great for erotic parties and swing time, but you should act natural for foreigners or curious onlookers who haven’t signed up to get an intimate look at your nether regions.