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The climax of sex is usually an orgasm. Below are the secrets of sex without climax which include ignoring the advice.

Orgasm is the ultimate pleasure that you feel during sex. There will always be discussions and debates about how to have more, better orgasms and the sex positions to have orgasms. Any discussion about satisfactory sex must emphasize the importance of orgasms. If anyone confesses to never having an orgasm, there is usually a feeling of pity. Once your audience knows that you have never had an orgasm, they will develop ideas for how to achieve an orgasm. If they want to gossip, they will spread the word that you are frigid. There is a lot of pressure among sexually active people to achieve orgasms. Most people believe that a sexual experience is not a success of orgasm has not been achieved. The following are the ways that you can achieve a satisfying sex life without an orgasm;

Ignore the Advice

You cannot avoid hearing all kinds of advice about orgasm. Some people will even suggest that you visit a doctor or a therapist to cure you. Some people believe that something must be off with you to not experience orgasms. You'll experience a lot of pressure from your partner, too, if they are the type that believes that sex without orgasm is not exciting. Some partners do not enjoy sex with a partner that does not have an orgasm, which is why women are notoriously known for faking orgasms. For some men, being able to bring a woman to orgasm boosts their ego. Do not feel like you are a lesser person than others because you do not experience orgasm. Hite (2003) states that there is nothing wrong with you. There is a lot more going on with sex than just an orgasm. Reject the pressure.

Be Open to Trying Some Methods of Achieving an Orgasm

Being open to trying other methods of achieving an orgasm is the tip for the woman who is already feeling deficient for not having an orgasm. Women have two types of orgasms; vaginal orgasm and clitoral orgasm. If a woman can have either or both orgasms, that is good enough never to have an orgasm. Achieving a vaginal orgasm is usually harder than achieving clitoral orgasm, as stated by Koedt (1970). Achieving a vaginal orgasm is usually trial and error until someone hits your G-spot. To achieve a clitoral orgasm, you can have it by riding your partner. This style fits the style known as the woman on top. The tip for the men that surrendered to the opinions of busybodies until they felt they needed help to reach an orgasm, the trick could be semen retention. Semen retention is stopping the ejaculation. When you are about to ejaculate, you stop it. Semen retention should help you have a better orgasm and have multiple orgasms in the future. Some men and women experience orgasms when they masturbate. Try masturbating too, and see if you get an orgasm.

Do Not Set Orgasm as the Goal of Having Sex

Avoid anyone that wants to overwhelm you with that thought. Unless it is a quickie, sex can involve a lot of things. It could be sweet and sensual. It may be the chance that you need to bond and enjoy your relationship. All the good things that happen during sex cannot happen if the couple is only focused on an orgasm. Shelve the orgasm. Let it be about love-making. Do not ask silly questions like, "did you have an orgasm?” Such a question does not help anyone. If anything, it dampens the mood. Sometimes, you will be lied to. It is an unnecessary question. 

Appreciate the Orgasms That You Achieve In Other Ways

An orgasm does not have to be strictly after penetrative sex. You could achieve it after oral, anal, or role-playing. You need to appreciate whichever orgasm you get–if you get one. You may not experience something as explosive as what you've watched in porn or heard from your friends. Whatever different sensations you felt, no matter how mild they were, is the orgasm. 

Communicate About it

When you do not have an orgasm, it means that the quality of the sex affects both of you. You may have a partner who believes that if you do not have an orgasm, then you did not enjoy the sex and that he underperformed. It could hurt your self-esteem and self-confidence.  

Accept Yourself 

The truth is that orgasms are overrated. If you enjoy having sex without an orgasm, it should not bother you. All you have to do is to have a positive attitude toward sex. If you have a partner who overemphasizes the need for an orgasm no matter how much you explain that the orgasm is not important, then the partner is the problem and not you. 


There is so much focus on orgasm, and every other activity during sex is underplayed. There is, therefore, disappointment between couples when partners fail to reach an orgasm. Sexual performance should not be about the finish line. Focusing on the climax stresses the couple, and all they want to ask each other when they finish a session is, 'did you cum?" You have sex to reduce the stress; when you end up with sex that does not end with an orgasm, you are still stressed. The partners would be happier if they focused on enjoying the foreplay and the intimacy. They would be able to communicate about the lack of orgasm without crazy expectations. It is possible to have pleasurable sex without an orgasm.


Hite, S. (2003). The Hite report: A nationwide study of female sexuality. Seven Stories Press.

Koedt, A. (1970). The myth of the vaginal orgasm. Radical feminism: A documentary reader, 371-7.