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Collars Restraints Guide by Sex Expert Katie Lasson

Collars Restraints Guide by Sex Expert Katie Lasson

Sexual pleasure is not only achieved using penetrating and teasing toys. Adding collar restraints such as lockable, O-ring, and posture collars can also make a difference in your bedroom play and elevate your sexual pleasures.

Collars Restraints Guide by Sex Expert Katie Lasson

Collar restraints play many roles depending on who puts them on, the place used, and the intention. For this case, lovers who choose to use bondage collars to their bedroom game add points for achieving orgasmic bliss. However, the pleasure achieved depends on the experience that one has. According to Taormino (2012), collars are used for bondage play. For beginners who venture into the game for the first time, things might not work well as expected. Therefore, such people need to be well-versed with collar restraints before buying them.

What are Collar Restraints?

Collar restraints worn by one partner around the neck for a kinky bondage game. These devices are made from different materials. Even though they are used in bondage play almost the same way, people have different thoughts about them. For instance, some do not feel like they are truly submissive without one. The devices truly have a great impact on your bond and adding them into your kinky life is a wise option. However, choosing the perfect one that works well with your partner can be critical. However, do not worry. This article highlights different collars and how to choose one that will satisfy your needs.

Why use Collar Restraints?

Collar restraints can have a variety of meanings in the kinky community. Harrington & Williams (2012) explains that wearing a collar may symbolize ownership, loyalty, devotion, or subservience. It may also have the same meaning as a wedding ring outside role-playing. Collars may be part of the accessories in a kinky session. The person wearing the collar represents the image of submissiveness. According to Zadig (2021), some men also wear the restraints with their mistresses. When you wear the collar in public, you may signal to others that you are submissive and "owned" by or in a relationship with a dominant partner. It may also be a tangible symbol of a relationship as proof of ownership in which the submissive partner is held. If the collar is lockable, it may symbolize the surrendering of power by the submissive to the dominant holding the key. This means that the submissive partner is under the dominant's command and can only be free when the dominant partner unlocks the collar. Being deliberately in a collar is known as being "collared".

How Can Couples Use Collar Restraints?

Couples use collar restraints depending on the type of collar that perfectly represents their relationship. The following are the types of collars that couples in dominant/submissive relationships use;

Consideration Collars

These collars aren't common, but some people use them to show that they are thinking about getting into a relationship with a submissive partner. It is a temporary collar, and the dominant partner may decide to replace it with a permanent collar.

Training Collars

When one wears these collars, it means that the dominant partner is still training the submissive partner to elevate them from being considered a permanent partner.

Permanent Collars

They are worn when the dominant partner is serious about the submissive partner and may now get into a relationship equal to marriage. Submissive and dominant may be equal to that marriage. Some permanent collars have keys, and when the relationship ends, the submissive partner ceases to wear the collar. A permanent partner may wear the collar throughout, although some prefer to wear it once in a while.

Day Collars

These collars may seem like ordinary neckwear to an observer. They are worn outside the kinky scene during day-to-day activities while among people who may not understand dominant/ submissive relationships and being collared.

Play Collars

These restraints are like costumes during kinky sessions or parties. The party collars are not worn outdoor. After the session, the role of the collars ends too.

Protection Collars

These collars are worn to keep off other dominants. Protection collars signifies that the submissive is taken. A protection collar is like a fake marriage ring or an engagement ring.

Types of Collars Restraints

Lockable Collars Restraints

Lockable or locking collars restraints are made from different high-quality materials and appear in varied colors and shapes. The devices have locking roller buckles that lock around the neck for comfortability. They also have adjustable straps that run down the back to the wrist restraints to keep your partner into complete slavery. This bondage system has a soft loop for handling while in the game with your sub. They come in different sizes to fit different necks, ranging from small to large necks.

Choker Collars Restraints

According to Peterson (2019), chocker collar restraints have adjustable buckles ranging from small to very large sizes to fit everyone perfectly. They are made from a variety of body-friendly materials to ensure that you all experience good times. The devices are meant for bed play, but can also be worn in role-playing props, and nightclub clothing.

O-Ring Collar Restraints

O-ring collar restraints are made from various quality materials like nylon, plastic, and leather to ensure a safer game. They are available in various sizes ranging from small to large to allow you to get one that fits you perfectly. Furthermore, the welded O-ring design allows easy attachment for compatibility. They have adjustable buckles to allow re-fastening before the game starts. Their vibrant colors create a romantic impression and enhance a happy mood.

Posture Collar Restraints

Posture collar restraints are designed to improve your posture and play a crucial role while having sex. For instance, if your partner is not well-positioned, you can use it to bring her in the right position. Furthermore, you can use it to keep your lover's chin up for comfort sex. Some have one ring while others two are attached firmly at the front side of the neck.

Factors to Consider When Choosing Collar Restraints

Buy a Body-Safe Material

Hakala & Mustak (2017) explains that material type should always be prioritized when buying sex devices, to ensure everyone enjoys the play. Therefore, ensure that the collar of your choice is made from a body-friendly material like leather, nylon, and silicone for comfortability.

Buy the Right Size

While some collars have adjustable buckles and straps, others are made from non-stretchy materials. Thus, you have to select one that can fit your neck perfectly for a frustrating-free play. Always choose one that will allow you to play around it comfortably.

Consider Their Safety Mechanisms

According to Caro-Morán et al. (2016), the neck is one of the most sensitive body parts that need careful handling. Ensure that the collar can quickly be removed if anything happens. Also, the rings should be smooth to prevent cuttings.

Check Their Adjustability

Before buying any collar, check on the adjustability to ensure compatibility and comfortability during the play. Adjustability will allow your sub to play around comfortably without any restrictions. Furthermore, it allows for different positions during the game.


Collars have different features like straps and rings that must be checked if they are constructed well. Also, the buckle, which entails a closing mechanism, should be firmly fixed and strong enough for comfortability.

Locking Mechanism

Ensure that the lockers are firm enough to avoid breaking the momentum of the game. They should be easily locked and unlocked by you or even your sub.

How to Use Collar Restraints

  • If you are new to collar restraints, start small and work your way up while you adjust to them.
  • When tying with your partner, ensure you can quickly get them off in case of choking.
  • Adjust the collar to allow at least two fingers to fit perfectly while playing.
  • Ensure that the buckles are completely locked for a comfortable game.
  • Use the rings to position your lover whenever she goes out of position.

Collars Restraints Guide by Sex Expert Katie Lasson

Safety Tips

  • Always be ready to protect your lover in case she or he cannot move freely.
  • Never make a lock you cannot quickly remove your lover out of.
  • Never leave your locked partner alone.
  • Communicate with your partner about using collars before you buy one.
  • Do not tighten the collar or loosen them, it should fit snugly to allow smooth breathing.
  • Consider your partner’s health before using the collars.
  • Keep your collars quite personal. Unlike other bondage devices, collars should not be shared. If you wish to have collars in one session, you will rather get one more for the other partner.
  • Be cautious of sharp objects on the collars to avoid skin cuttings.
  • Always clean your collar as recommended after every session.

Frequently Asked Questions about Collar Restraints.

What are Restraint Collars Made of?

Restraint collars are mainly made of leather material. Other materials used to make restraint collars are rubber, PVC, and stainless steel. Some collars have decorations such as hooks, rivets, and spikes made of tough plastic or metal.

Are There Plus-sized Collar Restraints?

There are plus-sized collar restraints. Some collar restraints are also adjustable.

Can I Use Collar Restraints on the Ankles?

No, you cannot use the collar restraint on the feet because, by design, you'll need two collar restraints held together so that you can restrain both ankles. Instead, you may consider a full-body body restraint that comes in a set as a collar, an ankle restraint, and a wrist restraint.

Are Collar Restraints Adjustable?

Yes, some collars are adjustable. The adjustable collar restraints are usually leather, PVC, or rubber, resembling belts.

How Do I Clean My Collar Restraints?

The collar restraints hug the neck, and if you do not observe hygiene, you may treat skin conditions on your neck. Cleaning the collar restraints depends on the material that it's made of. Most collar restraints are made of leather. Use a damp cloth to wipe away the dust, body fluids, and salts. Do not mess up the leather by submerging it in water. For metal decorations on the collar restraint and the collar restraints made of metal, you need to use a slightly damp cloth and oil the metal so that it does not rust.

What Should I Do If My Collar Restraint Gets Stuck?

If you are in the middle of a BDSM session and realize that your collar is stuck, you should alert your partner to avoid strangulation. You should not panic. In a BDSM session, there should be "safe words," and you should not hesitate to use them if you feel any discomfort. According to Schori, Jackowski & Schön (2021), safe words can be used to end an activity. If the collar restraint is fabric, you may cut it with a knife. If it is locked and the key won't open, you may need to lubricate the key first. If everything else fails, you'll need to rush to the hospital.

If I Wear a Collar Restraint In Public, Will People Know?

In the past, the collar restraint had initials, and if you wore it outdoors, everyone would know that you were into kinky sex. But nowadays, the collar restraints that people wear in public could pass for an ordinary jewelry.

How do I Introduce Collar Restraints into My Relationship?

Introducing collar restraints will be an easy task for people already involved in a submissive/dominant relationship, especially in a kinky relationship, because it will mean that they'd be adding a tangible symbol to their relationship. But in conservative, vanilla couples, you ought to start as a conversation. They'll probably have to discuss their roles in the relationship, and after that, if they can agree on the roles, they may decide on what the collar means to their relationship. The couple is supposed to communicate their desires open-mindedly without criticism. It is irrelevant to introduce collars without your partner's consent because the collar should serve a symbolic meaning between the two of you and your relationship.


Collar restraints are part of sex accessories designed to add some flavor into your bedroom play. The devices are available in various colors, shapes, sizes, and materials to fit every person’s desires. A point of choosing the best one for your bond is challenging, especially for beginners. Thus, when choosing consider the material, size, adjustability, locking mechanism, and cleaning procedure. Always be careful when using the restraints on your lover to avoid accidents. For instance, avoid tightening them to provide room for smooth breathing. 


Caro-Morán, E., Fernández-Lao, C., Diaz-Rodriguez, L., Cantarero-Villanueva, I., Madeleine, P., & Arroyo-Morales, M. (2016). Pressure pain sensitivity maps of the neck-shoulder region in breast cancer survivors. Pain medicine17(10), 1942-1952.


Harrington, L., & Williams, M. (2012). Playing well with others: Your field guide to discovering, navigating and exploring the kink, leather and BDSM communities. SCB Distributors.

Peterson, T. (2019). Trans. Lulu Press, Inc.

Schori, A., Jackowski, C., & Schön, C. A. (2021). How safe is BDSM? A literature review on fatal outcome in BDSM play. International journal of legal medicine, 1-9.

Taormino, T. (2012). 50 shades of kink: An introduction to BDSM. Cleis Press.

Zadig, A. (2021). Yes, Mistress: Why Men Crave Female Domination. Savio Republic.