SENSUAL DOMINANCE: THE COMPLETE STEP-BY-STEP GUIDE.

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Barbara Santini
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What is sensual dominance? How does an individual achieve sensual dominance? What are some ways that an individual needs to achieve such dominance? This article explains sensual dominance and the steps involved in the dominance.

When it comes to dominance in the bedroom, BDSM is one way to go. But dominance is not only about the pain and punishment of BDSM. However, you can go lighter with sensual dominance. You might want to consider this first if you are new to BDSM. Then later, you can try BDSM. Sensual dominance is all about increasing the connection and intimacy between you and your partner. 

What runs through your mind when you hear the word dominance? When it comes to sex and pleasure, dominance is one core value. But we are not talking about the chaining up whipping and, basically, all that BDSM drama. Dominance doesn't have to be a painful experience that can turn off some. Domination doesn't have to be hardcore; try sensual dominance. Sensual dominance mainly focuses on sensation and pleasure over pain and punishment, making it a better route when dominance is considered. Try this first if you wonder what exchange of power is like in the bedroom. Then you will decide whether you will still go for BDSM gear. Here are the complete steps on how to do it right. 

It's All about Sensations

Instead of the BDSM gear, you can bring simpler implements that will still light up things.

• Blindfolds-you can find a scarf, t-shirt tie, or even your stockings to make a temporary blindfold.
• Light bondage- you can recreate the cuffs used in BDSM gear by using lighter implements like scarfs or a tie to tie your partner to the bed.
• Ice cubes- I bet you have seen this in movies or porn sites. Where you put an ice cube in your mouth as you go down on them, recreate this in the bedroom in your way.
• Costumes- add a little fun into your roleplay by dress-up to stimulate your man visually.
• Feathers and fur create a rather nice light sensation when flogged on the skin.

You want to find out what your partner needs and wants and give them just that. Detandt et al. (2017) explained that the pleasure is mostly to the submissive one and can be rather pleasing and arousing. Learn to give your partner these pleasures unselfishly; it is pretty nice to have their pleasures at your mercy. So, prepare the room before you dive into these pleasures. Have the implements you will need strategically placed at certain points. Focus on your partner's needs and communicate through them to make it more interesting. According to Halwani (2018), sensual dominance exists between married people because of their strong bonds. You can also use this to strengthen the connection between you and your partner.

Award, Don’t Scold 

The whole idea behind sensual dominance is sensation pleasure, not punishment. Another advantage of sensual satisfaction is that it goes well with certain types of role play. It makes it even more interesting. Suppose you are the submissive one; stay right there and do as tell. Be calm and let your partner work your sensations up, so don't disappoint. Men can be rather uncomfortable; thus, help them succeed in being dominant, and you can reward them later. Whisper sweet things in their ears and give them that toe-curling, back-arching orgasm. You can give it to a man orally or physically. They earned it, so make sure they get rewarded. Also, submit to your partner completely to please them that they will reward you.

Incorporate Satisfaction with pain  

Many people enjoy pain and satisfaction like the different sides of the same coin. Ismail et al. (2017) stated that the more satisfaction you can give equals the amount of pain you can take in. You can use this to your advantage to increase your endurance in pain. A nice way is through oral sex or a hand job. Just as one is about to cum, you can pinch them and scratch them simultaneously. Some girls are known to scratch the back of the guy in bed when they are at the peak of satisfaction and are about to orgasm. Some men may find this unpleasant, but some find it rather fine. Take it a notch higher, and make it more interesting by spanking them, pinching their nipples. You can also bite them a little bit, but make sure you do it right not to make it unpleasant. Anyway, you can still incorporate pain and satisfaction and still enjoy yourselves.

The Aftercare 

Herbenick et al. (2022) stated that just because sensual domination is not rough doesn’t mean it can't go wrong. After the session, makes an effort to check on your partner and get them a glass of water afterward. Make sure that you have a way of communicating whether you should slow down or stop altogether. You can use the colors on the traffic lights as safe words to communicate different messages. You can also talk to your partner directly and ask them if you should go slower or stop altogether. Ask him whether they are enjoying it or not. The key here is communication to make sure you check on them the whole way.

Switch up Things 

This article has educated you on how to act when being on either side. Whether you are the one being dominated or the one dominating over your partner, it has well explained sensual dominance. You can incline on either side of these roles. But experts play on both sides and are referred to as switchers. You can take turns in dominating each other to make it even more fun. This way, everybody gets to explore their ideas with their partners.

Conclusion 

If you are getting to understand all about dominance and submission, then this is a nice way to start things small. Before you jump into the BDSM gear to make things more intense, sensual dominance may be less kinky than other types of BDSM and is rather gentle. BDSM is also found to be unpleasant and terrifying to some people. Keep in mind that not everything will work for you and your partner. It is a nice idea but remembers, each individual has different preferences. Give it a try, though, before lashing it out. There are many ways to explore your pleasures in the bedroom as individuals are advised to carry out their research and find what suits them and their partner.

References 

Detandt, S., Leys, C., & Bazan, A. (2017). A French translation of the pleasure arousal dominance (PAD) semantic differential scale to measure the effect and drive. Psychological Belgica, 57(1), 17.

Halwani, R. (2018). Philosophy of love, sex, and marriage: an introduction. Routledge.

Herbenick, D., Guerra-Reyes, L., Patterson, C., Rosenstock Gonzalez, Y. R., Wagner, C., & Zounlome, N. (2022). “It was scary, but then it was kind of exciting”: Young women’s experiences with choking during sex. Archives of sexual behavior, 51(2), 1103-1123.Ismail, S. A., Abbas, A. M., Habib, D., Morsy, H., Saleh, M. A., & Bahloul, M. (2017). Effect of female genital mutilation/cutting; types I and II on sexual function: a case-controlled study. Reproductive health, 14(1), 1-6.