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Are you thinking of getting in the mood for some pleasurable and satisfying sex and not knowing where to begin? Here is a complete guide on getting in the mood for sex to enjoy some pleasurable moments.

People find it challenging to put on a sexual mood daily as much as they want to make their partner happy. Some things often come naturally and cannot be forced. It is always fair to engage your partner before ripping their clothes off in need of sex. You can be technically off without any sexual moods. This is understandable, especially when you share it with your spouse. Some people are comfortable engaging in sexual intercourse, while others find it uncomfortable and weird. But how can you get your partner into the mood for sex when they are completely off?

Tips to Get You in the Mood for Sex 

If your sex drive is affected by things you can easily control, like tiredness and stress, then make your move. Talking to a healthcare provider or medical doctor can be the best move. Below are tips that can greatly help get you in the mood for sex.

Take Care of Yourself First

How can you plan to get into a sex mood when you are barely yourself? Being at your best might allow you to get in the right mood for sex without challenges. Consider clearing your mind since that will affect your general physical intimacy. Generally, begin by focusing on a healthy balanced diet and regular exercise. Making time for yourself is also essential for your sexual life and well-being. Moreover, if you are addicted to smoking or drinking, you might consider cutting down slowly or completely quitting.

Try New Things 

Most people lose the urge to engage in sexual activities because they are restless or bored. This is most common with individuals in long-term relationships. However, you can break the boredom and explore new things with your partner that you have never thought of before. You can consider the introduction of sex toys or role play. Moreover, you can also think of switching the environment, since having sex in the same place might make things boring. It is also essential that you nurture your emotional intimacy to help both parties before exploring new fantasies that will help spice up things in your sex life.

More Time for Sex 

Most partners consider intimacy an afterthought and will do it after a long day of work. Generally, this might not be the best thing, especially for partners in a relationship. Consider having a good plan or schedule for sex. This is technically essential for spicing up things in your sex life. Proper scheduling of sex ensures both parties have enough time for each other. This also helps prepare you emotionally, sexually, mentally, and physically to enjoy sex. 

Manage Your Stress 

Your sex drive can never be high when you have stress. Generally, stress is one of the common killers of libido. It is technically challenging to enjoy any sexual activity when under stress. Therefore, consider managing it if you want to get in the mood for sex again. Consider creating a regular routine for exercise, meditation, and breathing exercises. These activities will help you manage stress and boost your sex drive. Getting adequate sleep at night can also be the best solution to managing your stress. Generally, enough sleep affects your activeness and functionality during the day, which is great for stressed individuals. 

Remember or Discover What Turns You On

Have you ever imagined what turns you on whenever you are around your man? You can remember or discover it, then share it with your spouse. Letting your partner know what turns you on is something that will automatically get you in the mood for sex. You can always enjoy having sexting sessions with your partner before engaging in sex. You can also consider reading erotica or watching romantic videos with your partner. This is an act that will increase your desire to have sex.

Pleasure Yourself

Pleasuring yourself through masturbation is not new. This allows you to learn more about your bodily reaction and what you want your partner to give you. Brancato (2021) noted that masturbation reduces stress and enhances the production of feel-good chemicals, such as oxytocin and dopamine.  Moreover, engaging in solo plays gives you the urge to want the real thing. You can make everything sexy and pleasurable by masturbating while your spouse is in the room. You can also invite your lover if you are inspired.

Switch Up Your Sex Timetable 

Do you have a sex timetable in your room? Then, consider switching it up to create more time for sex. Engaging in sex at night, regularly, might make things boring for both parties. You can make some changes and consider having sex early in the morning before work. This will greatly help improve your sex drive.

Why You Might Not Be in the Mood for Sex

Realizing why you are not in the mood for sexual activities is one way of discovering ways to solve it. Trying out different tricks and tips to get in a sex mood might be frustrating, especially when you cannot understand why you do not have a sex mood. However, different aspects are prone to lowering your sex drive. They include;

  • Anxiety.
  • Depression.
  • Feeling guilt or shame. 
  • Life stressors like moving, babies, or death.
  • Unresolved issues in your previous relationship.
  • Hormonal changes.
  • Unaddressed trauma or abuse history.

If you are affected by the above aspects or any situation beyond your control, there are high chances of experiencing low libido. However, you can visit your doctor or any sex expert for medication. You can also go for mental and emotional checkups.


Brancato, S. (2021). " Feeling Myself": Masturbation In Women's Coming Of Age Novels. Georgetown University.