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HOW TO HAVE BETTER SEX WHEN YOU HAVE OCD

How To Have Better Sex When You Have Ocd

  • by Jekaterina Gussarova
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How To Have Better Sex When You Have Ocd

  • 〡 by Jekaterina Gussarova

Content Verification

Barbara Santini
Written by:✓
Barbara Santini
Psychologist and Sex and Relationships Advisor
Veronika Matutyte
Medically Reviewed by:✓
Veronika Matutyte
Medical Doctor
Katie Lasson
Fact Checked by:✓
Katie Lasson
Sex and Relationship Adviser

🔍 Quick & Cheeky Summary 🔍

  • ✨ Embrace the journey, not just the destination! 😉
  • 🛑 OCD can throw a spanner in the works, but strategies exist to keep the passion alive! ❤️
  • 💡 Communication = 🔑! Talk, laugh, and share your thoughts openly.
  • 🧘 Mindfulness, therapy & support – the triple threat to a healthy sex life.
  • 🔄 Adapt, experiment, and have fun! There’s no ‘one-size-fits-all’ in pleasure. 😏

💡 Key Advice & Tips from Our Experts 💡

  • 💖 Foreplay isn’t just an intro – it’s the main act! Take your time.
  • 🗣️ Communicate those desires & boundaries – clarity is sexy!
  • 🌙 Set the mood – lighting, music, & scents can do wonders.
  • 🚀 Experiment! New positions, toys, and techniques keep things thrilling. 🔥
  • 🧠 Mind over matter – stress less, enjoy more!

Having sex is a good activity that every human wants to experience. Still, some people have difficulty enjoying their sexual pleasure due to their physical or psychological condition—for example, people with obsessive-compulsive disorder. You can still have better sex with this disorder by doing the following; bringing it open, staying clean when getting dirty, trying out some fun bondage gears, and taking breaks.

Living with OCD means you have repetitive, obsessive unwanted, and terrifying thoughts which attack the person making them not have good moments. The content of obsession varies from person to person; for example, a person with OCD may experience violent thoughts of committing murder or suicide, and others have disturbing sexual thoughts and images like those involving children, family members, or religious figures. These compulsions are used to prevent t the person from bad happenings and reduce anxiety, and sexual anxiety is one of the things that these people experience. If you have this disorder and are wondering how you will have better sex, this article highlights some things you can do to make you have better sex when having OCD.

How To Have Better Sex When You Have OCD

Bring It to Open

People struggle with different disorders. It will be much help when you come out about the things that bother you. Do not leave your partner in the dark. Let them know what is on your mind. This will help them to do things that will make you suffer or struggle. According to Frederick et al. (2017), you could tell your partner how you feel about sexual acts like having a blowjob, oral sex, or sex toys. This will help them to avoid things triggering OCD. Speaking it out will give you a chance and the confidence to ask for anything at any time without them questioning you. When feeling the waves of anxiety and the bad intrusive thoughts, they understand that there is nothing they can do about it. They will have to help you ease the tension and the situation and cope with OCD.

Stay Clean When Getting Dirty

Abramowitz et al.(2013) stated that people with OCD might experience disturbing sexual thoughts that might affect their reaction while making out with them. For example, Know-how to deal with the situation if you have a problem with doing oral because mess might get on your hands or mouth making you feel uncomfortable. Get clean water or a towel to make things easy in the middle of the session. You can wipe your hands, helping you deal with and calm your anxieties. Whichever form your OCD appears, ensure you control anxiety so you can have the fun you desire from the sexual act or arousal. This helps you to chill and improve your sex life.

Use Sensory Deprivations

Zimbardo et al.(2012) noted that Using sensory deprivation is therapeutic, which helps to overcome anxiety giving you ample time to explore your sexuality. For example, using blindfolds will make your mind focus on one thing instead of meandering around thoughts destroying your moment. You can try the noise-canceling headphones, although one of the best things you would want to hear is what your partners say to you when making out. Similarly, they will prevent you from listening to the surroundings and might cause the mind to shift to other things that are not pleasant. but if you know this will help you keep the disturbing thoughts in your head and spoil the steamy moment, it is better off

Try Some Fun Bondage Gear

People with OCD are not abnormal or sexually inactive. This means they are sexually active like any other normal person. Therefore, if you know you are a sex freak, fun bondage gear can work wonders for you. This is a chance to play submissive and make your partner explore you the way they desire. You can decide to hang up; this will keep your mind at work as you will get something to concentrate on, keeping everything that gives you anxiety at bay. Get comfortable cuffs not to hurt yourself while looking for pleasure. Bondage sex seems more intimidating if you have never practiced it, but getting used to it will be much fun.

Use Lubricants

This will mostly work well when oral, and the smell that it creates irritates you. Harvey (2016) advised that you could use flavored lubes such as mint to make the scene favorable for you. Some OCD people are extra sensitive, and using the lube can make it more comfortable without friction or sores that might make you anxious. Ensure to get a lube, but it should be slick and smooth for better results.

Use Sex Toys

Sex toys improve people's sex life and also up their game. When you use a sex toy, you can explore your sexual desires since most of them help you to meet your sexual needs. According to Trower (2012), you could use the vibrator to stimulate yourself, and if the sound produced may affect you, get the one that can be regulated to make you comfortable while making out. When using sex toys, you can explore and understand your body, whether so or with a partner. Use enough lubricant to increase the sensation in the genitals; that is how to improve your sex life even with OCD.

Get Breaks

Feel free to call it off if the feeling is getting too intense. This will only be a good choice to make when you have already talked to your partner, they understand what is going on with you. You will not want to let your partners stay in the darkness and keep wondering what the issue would be when you keep asking for the time off when things are getting hot. This will help you to compose yourself and get back to the game without any fears.

Conclusion

Understand that managing intrusive thoughts calls for more mental energy when all the things happen so fast, and you don't want to take a break, cuddle, catch a breath, hydrate, and then get back to the game when you are all settled, it is all allowed.

References

Abramowitz, J. S., Baucom, D. H., Wheaton, M. G., Boeding, S., Fabricant, L. E., Paprocki, C., & Fischer, M. S. (2013). Enhancing exposure and response prevention for OCD: A couple-based approach. Behavior Modification, 37(2), 189-210.

Harvey, L. (2016). Classification of Silicone-Based Personal and Condom Lubricants Using DART-TOFMS.

Trower, S. (2012). Senses of vibration: A history of the pleasure and pain of sound. A&C Black.

Zimbardo, P., Sword, R., & Sword, R. (2012). The time cure: Overcoming PTSD with the new psychology of time perspective therapy. John Wiley & Sons.


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