HOW YOU CAN HAVE A FUNCTIONAL (AND SEXY) D/S RELATIONSHIP
Is there something missing in your relationship? Try a D/S relationship for more sexual structure, desire, and control in your relationship. Learn more about the D/S relationship by reading this article.
From the outside view, people think that dominant and submissive relationship is always confusing, intimidating, and in some cases, abusive. However, if you sink below common sense, you discover that it is a dynamic, thoughtful, and rewarding type of sex that needs more communication and unshakable trust between partners. Trust and communication are the guiding principles of the Dom/sub relationship, according to Bohunicky & Youngblood (2019). The question is, is a dominant submission relationship right for you? Under what circumstances should you engage in Dom/sub relationship with your partner? At what time should you play the dominant role and vice versa? Find answers to the above questions by reading on.
Dominance and Submission – A Relationship That Goes Beyond Sex
This relationship involves interactions between partners and is accompanied by communication. For some couples in this type of relationship, its dynamic penetrates deep into their life and not in the bedroom alone.
Roles of Dominant and Submissive Partners in a Relationship
The basic principle in this relationship is that one partner plays the dominant role while the other plays the submissive role. Depending on their role, you can use different titles, such as daddy, to refer to any partner. The dominant partners always take the higher titles while submissive partners take on the lower ones, such as boys, girls, and slaves. The name one partner chooses to use can be personal or according to the relationship's situation. The titles have significance in the relationship and are not for decoration. For instance, a daddy and a girl in this relationship may include elements of parenting. However, every D and S relationship is different. You might want a D and S relationship where you reflect in time on your traditional roles that were solely tied to gender.
Many partners who take the dominant role are sadists. According to Hazelwood, Dietz, & Warren (1992), a sadist is a person who likes to give punishment to others. Likely, most partners who take submissive roles are masochists. Kamping et al. (2016) explained that masochists are people who obtain their pleasure from pain. However, it might be different in some relationships depending on the partners’ agreement on how they will be operating. In domination, the pain induced is minimized and controlled because the sole focus of them is to induce pleasure that will be accompanied by the pain.
The natural behaviors of a partner reflect their influence on their activities in the D/S relationship. This way, you will notice that partners in D and S relationships are unique and always stand out from others.
Most people have a feeling that the roles of the partners in the D and S relationship are based on their personalities. This might be the case under minimal circumstances, but that is not what partners agree on in this kind of relationship. You can be playing the submissive role but make up a good dominant partner. Some things drive people towards their roles. For instance, a dominant partner may be pushed towards their role if they love dominating, inflicting pain on others, caring about, or protecting other people. The traits come naturally, and such people make the best-dominating partners.
However, that doesn’t mean that if you are not guided by instincts, you won’t make up for a perfect partner in this relationship. Some partners are driven to dominate their significant others, and that’s what calls in for their roles in this relationship. If partners have the same instincts, then it is up to them to decide on which partner to play what role. The same goes for submissive partners. Although the play is based on their agreement, their instincts guide them to take their roles.
Learning Submission or Dominance
Most people who sort to engage in this type of relationship look for potential partners, at least those who have been in this type of relationship before. This is because they are experienced, and everything will run smoothly with little guidance. Although a willing inexperienced partner in matters of dominance and submission comes, they will easily find out which role they can perform.
In some cases, changing a regular relationship into a D and S relationship, especially for submissive partners, might not be satisfying or realistic. Such situations may arise when a submissive partner has a partner who is not dominating.
When trying to play the dominant role, the vanilla partner may end up seeking validation and instructions from the submissive partner. The submissive partners cannot code and match to a person who is following instructions but not feeling their part in the role. It is not impossible to learn the roles. You only need to find your flavor and train on it for a while before engaging with your partner.
The Bottom Line
People have different views about the Dom and sub relationship. This relationship is dynamic, thoughtful, and rewarding. The D/S relationship needs more communication and unshakable trust between partners. Some partners are driven to dominate their opposite sex, which calls in for their roles in this relationship. If partners have the same instincts, then it is up to them to decide on which partner to play what role. The same goes for submissive partners. Although the play is based on the agreement between the partners, their natural instincts guide them to take their roles.
References
Bohunicky, K., & Youngblood, J. (2019). The Pro Strats of Healsluts: Overwatch, Sexuality, and Perverting the Mechanics of Play. Gender Studies.
Hazelwood, R. R., Dietz, P. E., & Warren, J. (1992). The criminal sexual sadist. FBI L. Enforcement Bull., 61, 12.
Kamping, S., Andoh, J., Bomba, I. C., Diers, M., Diesch, E., & Flor, H. (2016). Contextual modulation of pain in masochists: involvement of the parietal operculum and insula. Pain, 157(2), 445.