The Cons of Dating Older Men

By Elena Ognivtseva

When it comes to dating older men, what kind of attitude is a girl to have? For one thing, we see celeb hotties like Daniel Radcliffe and Aston Kutcher chasing after older women, and doing so with great relish. Then there’s the ubiquitous girl-dating-an-older-man who’ll happily rattle off a list of perks that come with getting a sugar daddy, many of which have nothing to do with his wallet.

So being the intrepid explorer that I am, I did some interviews with ladies who have tried the older male route. Heck, I even tried dating one myself! By the way, when I say “older” I do mean older. Ten to twenty years our senior, these aren’t the young hunks we’d typically single out for a good time, but with so many apparent perks, I had to investigate. So, what insights did I glean? Quite a few actually. Turns out that quite a lot of those supposed benefits of dating a dude who could be your dad are nothing but myths.

Let’s start with the most common of them, that your older man will be better in bed. Well he’s certainly more experienced, but that’s not the same thing as better. Energy levels tend to wane when one starts hitting the mid-forties, whereas a young stud can be relied upon to perform. As for having plenty of experience, that can also mean he’s stuck in his ways. Plenty of the interviewees complained that rather than finding a mature stallion with technique to boot, they ended up with a guy who just wanted the same spiel every time.

Another myth about dating older men is that he’ll definitely be more mature than young, capricious dudes. Major misconception this one. Rather than having all his priorities in order, he’s probably going through a mid-life crisis, looking to relive his glory days with the help of a young broad on his arm. If a forty-something is looking to hook up, he’s more likely a man going through his second adolescence than the down-to-earth partner you’re after. Plenty of women think that an older man is a safe bet because he’ll have sown his wild oats and be done with playing games. Truth is, a guy like that is still on his game, only better at hiding it.

So what about the money? An older guy is probably loaded right? True, you can find yourself a serious sugar daddy, but just because he’s got himself a proper career doesn’t mean he’s got cash to throw around. Whilst college lads may have to work bar jobs to scrape together enough for dates, older males have bills; mortgage payments, school fees for their kids and pension deposits. Sorry to say, his paycheck will be taking care of those first and you second.

What illusions still need shattering? Well now we’re down to idealized fantasies. We’ve all entertained the idea of a passionate romance with a confident, George Clooney lookalike, but it’s getting a reality check here. Whilst Clooney may still be swoon-worthy, most men aren’t going to age with such grace. What’s more, just because he’s older doesn’t mean that his confidence is unshakeable. If anything, he’s likely got more hang ups than a younger, more naïve man.

So what about my experience dating an older male? Not all of the above proved true, but then I got lucky. He wasn’t a man-child and he wasn’t too financially burdened to show me a good time, but when it came to the bedroom, there proved to be some…issues. Bottom line is this: that sugar daddy fantasy of yours is just that, a fantasy.