THE INS AND OUTS OF AUTOSEXUALITY
THE INS AND OUTS OF AUTOSEXUALITY
Have you ever encountered an autosexual person, or do you think you are one? What makes you know that one is an autosexual? Here is everything you need to know about autosexuality, including the definition, signs, tests, underlying causes, and how to talk about it.
Autosexuality has become real, and many people are affected by it. Besides being one of the common phrases you will encounter, there is still a lot you do not know about autosexuality. According to Perelman (2016), autosexual people consider masturbating rather than engaging in a partnered sex. However, this does not mean they will never have a sexual relationship. Generally, autosexual people often feel sexually aroused when they stimulate themselves than when someone does it. But this does not mean that they are not normal. Everything about their sexual life surrounds them, from sexual desires to self-stimulation. Here is a complete guide to help you understand autosexuality and its causes.
Jakubek et al. (2021) define an autosexual person as anyone who is sexually attracted to themselves. It might be a new word to many people, especially those who have never encountered such people. Autosexual people barely have sexual feelings for other people, but it does not mean they cannot be sexually connected to others or make love. However, some autosexual people are comfortable not having sex or being sexually attracted to other people. Autosexuality is technically the natural aspect and expression of erotic desires. Moreover, you should not confuse autosexuality with autoromanticism. Autosexual people are not capable of desiring or loving other people regardless of their gender and appearance.
Is Autosexual Same as Asexual
Being autosexual is not in any way identical to asexuality. However, most people feel that autosexuality falls used the umbrella of the asexual, asexual spectrum, or race-spec identity. Moreover, autosexuality is also referred to as race-spec identity. Therefore, this means asexual and autosexual can mean the same thing.
Is Autosexuality Identical to Autoromantic
Autosexual refers to feeling attracted to yourself sexually, while autoromantic is feeling romantically attracted to oneself. This means they are two different things. However, one can be both autosexual and autoromantic. However, not all autosexual people are autoromantic. However, it is possible to be the following;
- Autosexual and homoromantic (someone who is romantically attracted to other people either of the similar or same genders)
- Autosexual and biromantic (one who is romantically attracted to people who have multiple genders)
- Autosexual and aromantic (completely feel no romantic or sexual attraction)
Signs That You Could be Autosexual
Here are some of the signs that will help you know if you are an autosexual or not;
You Prefer Masturbation to Sex
You might not say no to having sex, but you know that solo pleasures give you the best orgasms. If you realize that you are much into solo stimulations and masturbation, then that indicates you are autosexual.
You Use Fantasies About Yourself When Having Sex to Orgasm
Technically, if you are often turned on or get deeper orgasms by fantasizing about yourself, you are an autosexual person. You might not get turned on when you see other people having sex, but you get sexually aroused when you are alone.
You Fantasize About Yourself When Masturbating Instead of Watching Porn
Here, you are always the bearer of the masturbatory role. You will likely focus more on your body, thoughts, scent, or mind. Moreover, a person who focuses more on these fantasies is considered autosexual.
You Prioritize Masturbation and Quality Time with Yourself Over the Pursuit to Date
When you are an autosexual, you can never accept going for a date even when given a chance. You are always pleased with a night with yourself.
You Have Erotic Dreams About Yourself
Have you ever had wet dreams about yourself? How did you explain that? Technically, this explains how you value yourself sexually more than other people of different or similar gender. Having erotic dreams about yourself means you are an autosexual.
You Love Having Sex in Front of a Mirror
If you are engaging in a partnered sex, you would prefer doing it in front of the mirror, especially when you are an autosexual. Autosexual-oriented people will do this since their image evokes arousal more than their partner.
How Autosexuals Differs from Narcissism
While most people commonly find autosexual and narcissism identical, it might be wrong and harmful, especially to those who are autosexual. According to Gabbard, & Crisp (2018), narcissists are often desperate for admiration, attention, and validation, which is different from auto sexuality. Autosexuality is a sexual orientation that describes different people's sexual beliefs and behaviors.
What to do if Your Partner is Autosexual
Have you ever wondered what you will do when your partner is an autosexual? Well, here are things you can do to your autosexual partner;
Do Not Take It Personal
Why take things personally when your partner has not said it is over between you? Moreover, taking things personally makes your partner feel like they are opposed to you. This will interfere with your sex drive.
Encouragement and support are essential in any romantic relationship. You can always encourage and support your partner to explore auto sexuality if it is their desire. Getting support from the people you love feels better and makes you free in whatever you do.
Respect their Identity
Autosexuality is a sexual orientation. This means it is similar to other orientations like pansexual, bisexual, lesbian, or gay. Therefore, consider respecting your partner's sexual identity. Questioning about their sexuality or comparing them to narcissists might feel uncomfortable.
Go in with an Open and Non-judgmental Mind
There should be no judgment between partners. One's sexual orientation should always be respected. If you wish to know your partner more, do not be too judgmental about their sexual orientation.
According to Wood (2014), communication is one of the essential aspects of any romantic relationship. Generally, it is meant to help partners understand each other. When you notice changes in your partner or doubt, they develop autosexual traits; the best way to deal with that is by communicating with them.
Gabbard, G. O., & Crisp, H. (2018). Narcissism and its discontents: Diagnostic dilemmas and treatment strategies with narcissistic patients. American Psychiatric Pub.
Jakubek, E., Jarząbek-Bielecka, G., Boroch, J., Mizgier, M., Plagens-Rotman, K., & Kędzia, W. (2021). Autosexual behavior as a topic for inclusion in gynecological practice. Clinical and Experimental Obstetrics & Gynecology, 48(2), 212-215.
Perelman, M. A. (2016). Psychosexual therapy for delayed ejaculation based on the sexual tipping point model. Translational andrology and urology, 5(4), 563.
Wood, J. T. (2014). Communication in our lives. Cengage Learning.