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Can’t Cum Through Pentrative Sex? Oh Yes You Can!

Can't Cum Through Pentrative Sex? Oh Yes You Can!

  • by Katie Peachesa
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Can't Cum Through Pentrative Sex? Oh Yes You Can!

  • by Katie Peachesa

Content Verification

Barbara Santini
Written by:
Barbara Santini
Psychologist and Sex and Relationships Advisor
Veronika Matutyte
Medically Reviewed by:
Veronika Matutyte
Medical Doctor
Katie Lasson
Fact Checked by:
Katie Lasson
Sex and Relationship Adviser

🔑 Key Takeaways 🔑

  • 💡 Penetrative orgasms? Possible, but technique matters!
  • 🔥 Clitoral stimulation is often the missing ingredient.
  • 🧠 The brain is the biggest erogenous zone—mindset is key.
  • 🛠️ Experimentation and communication are your best tools.
  • 🎢 Every body is different—embrace the journey!

🎓 Expert Advice & Top Tips 🎓

  • 💖 Foreplay isn’t optional—it’s the main event!
  • 👐 Try different positions to find what works best for YOU.
  • 🔮 A little lube goes a long way—silky, slippery, sensational.
  • 💬 Communicate openly—your partner isn’t a mind reader.
  • 🎭 Play with toys, textures, and temperatures for extra thrills.

By Ksenia Sobchak

Less than a quarter of women can orgasm through penetrative sex alone, with the rest of us needing clitoral stimulation to hit that big o.

Knowing that the majority of other women are in the same boat does nothing to help our frustration as sometimes it would be lovely if that quickie on the kitchen counter didn't have to involve a vibrator to reach a satisfying conclusion for both parties.

As a woman who has never found it easy to orgasm in company, with clitoral simulation or not I resigned myself to the fact that I'd never enjoy a penetrative climax. However I was wrong and now in middle age I can safely say I've had a few and I'm not stopping there.

It started when we both decided to explore the G Spot, I'd found my partners quite a while ago but he'd not taken time to discover mine. However, in a game for adults he was instructed to, and once he located it, I felt waves and waves of pleasure that didn't build to an orgasm but could have.

Following this I opened my mind and wondered what would happen if we carried on. It's a completely different feeling to a clitoral orgasm, not as intense somehow but more widespread. So we did. I felt the build up and some release but couldn't completely decide if it was an orgasm or not, as it was quite different.

However when we moved onto clitoral stimulation, I realised I was far too sensitive to try and really did feel completely as if I was recovering from a big O.

Now we've tried some positions that actually help with this too, the doggy position is brilliant, and so is anywhere I can position myself on top. All I need is for my G-spot to be tickled and away we go. There are also sex toys you can get that add a little extra to the penis to make sure your G-spot is stimulated during penetration. I've not tried these yet but I'm sure we will soon.

For those of you still trying to achieve this, start by making sure he finds your G-spot with his fingers. Once he knows where it is he's more likely to be able to position his penis during sex to make sure it hits the spot. For the first time it's also a good idea if you are completely relaxed, such as a hot bath, a sensual massage, a bit of kissing on the inner thighs, some stroking and then some exploration.

I realise this is fine for me to say, but trying to translate it to your other half can be difficult especially if they're happy just the way things are. Let them know that a great unselfish lover is sexier than a Brad Pitt with two willies and they should want to perform.

If you do try and try and nothing happens, don't worry. Some may disagree but although these small orgasms, (I coined the phrase, there's a whole lot of good in those little O's - sorry Cheerios') make quickies more fun and satisfying, I still prefer the clitoral orgasm by a mile. It's more explosive somehow.

Now if I could just combine the two.


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