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Katie Lasson
Sex and Relationship Adviser

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Veronika Matutyte
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Barbara Santini
Psychologist and Sex and Relationships Advisor

Do you know how to cum? It's easy, and there's no need for lessons. Some people struggle to cum during sex. Herein are ways to cum, including; questions on how to cum, your comfort, your relationship healthy, have you ever tried masturbation, and is the stimulation ideal?

Some men struggle with Cumming, while others cum every time they engage in sexual intercourse. Tromovitch (2020) stated that masturbation, also referred to as edging, can lead to Cumming. Failure to come calls for medical attention or therapeutically advise since it may be due to low hormonal balance or stress. Below are tips of how to cum during sex and masturbation.

Questions On How To Cum Easily

How’s Your Comfort?

Discomfort makes it hard to cum. Problems begin from being in the mood and getting wet for sex. Women require comfort to enjoy orgasm. The aspects below determine your comfort. For example;

Your Body

Everyone has body weaknesses. Research suggests that women evaluate their body images more than men, with greater preoccupations. Their satisfaction goes with how men view them. Women may not experience pleasure and cumin during sex if they think of their body defects.

Safety

Rickert et al. (2002) noted that feeling unsafe with your partner also denies the opportunity to enjoy sex. You can leave until you feel safe and comfortable.

Are You Fully Aroused?

You may be comfortable during sexual activities. However, it doesn't appeal, and you're not cumming. Maybe you're not turned on. You can identify your sex drive to be;

Responsive

Most women are responsive. They get turned on when a man arouses them through kissing, sexy eye contact, and caressing. A responsive sex drive reflects how sweet sex is, and you immediately want to do it. This can happen when trying to flirt or fool around. It's the opposite for men. Such women require sex drive accelerators, and it's dangerous to stop their sex drive.

Spontaneous Sex Drive

Spontaneous types get aroused randomly without making an effort to.

Is Your Relationship Healthy And Happy?

You could be dissatisfied with your relationship, and the impact hit your sex life. You could be feeling unloved. Your partner doesn't understand your likes or the presence of an emotional distance. This is regardless of an abusive partner. But it's different when you feel emotionally uplifted and sex is appreciated and open. You're likely to cum every time during sex. Your sex life and relationship health are related. One without the other is a fail and influences your orgasms. For example, if you have trust issues in your relationship, the body's response to sexual cues gets disrupted. Therapy can help some people overcome the problem and recover, but others may not.

Have You Tried Masturbation To Orgasm?

According to Driemeyer et al. (2017), cumming through masturbation is easier than sex, especially for the first time. Masturbation has many benefits, like, trying different techniques without being monitored. You go by your pace and concentrate on your pleasure. It also helps you realize your likes of sex. Various aids, such as fingers for clit and vaginal stimulation, grinding on objects, or spraying with the faucet or shower, help a person cum. However, you should pay attention to pleasure and not orgasm. Enjoy the entire moment without focusing on the final result. Free your mind from the fixture of cumming and allow your body to relax and enjoy the pleasure. Avoiding distractions when masturbating, such as erotica or porn, helps avoid fantasies that deny the opportunity for cumming.

Is The Stimulation Ideal?

Some people may find this obvious, but others need particular stimulation types to cum. While some women cum through penetrative sex, others must undergo clitoral stimulation before orgasm. Suppose the stimulation in the topic doesn't attain your needs, then chances for cummings are minimal, especially if you can stimulate yourself to cum in masturbation. It could be why most straight women rarely cum like lesbians or bisexuals. Women easily understand what's best for other women. Communication can help you express what you desire.

Any Life Changes You’re Undergoing?

You may lose a loved one if you shift to a new town or job, or maybe you lost a loved one. These are life dramas that can impact your bedroom life. Such life challenges call for a sexual brake. They exhaust your energy stores and leave you weak. This way, sex can’t be a priority. Others include pregnancy and after childbirth. Pregnancy can alter your sex drive. You may also experience a higher sexual drive that makes you more sensitive. It’s normal to have lower libido after delivery. This suggests you’ll enjoy sex less and reduce the frequency of having it. Women are advised to have sex six weeks after childbirth, but it's unnecessary. According to Parish et al. (2013), Menopause can also lower your sex urge due to atrophy that makes sex feel painful.

Have You Consulted A Doctor?

A doctor can help understand why you experience hardships in getting aroused. They may recommend treatment for situations such as Menopause. Solutions include estrogen supplements to raise libido, sensitivity, and lubrication. Some mental health disorders, such as depression or anxiety, can interfere with your sex life. Erectile dysfunction can be corrected, including dyspareunia and vaginismus related to women's health.

Do You Ever Get Education About Sex And Orgasm?

Research on sex matters, especially those affecting you, is important. Find out from various websites to know why your sex drive is low. You may discover the tricks to achieving an effortless orgasm. You can also get knowledge on how to get multiple orgasms. Doing this can impact your sex life significantly.

The Bottom Line

The above eight questions help change your sex life. They help you and your partner realize ways to improve your bedroom vibes and quality of sex. Orgasms matters mostly affect women. Some fake it to please their men, but this isn’t advisable because it limits your man from exploring new techniques that can make you cum better. Your man may also be hurt after finding out about the pretense. Most men can tell if you're faking. That's why you shouldn't stress yourself. Instead, mutually find better ways to make you cum, including solo masturbation.

Reference:

Driemeyer, W., Janssen, E., Wiltfang, J., & Elmerstig, E. (2017). Masturbation Experiences Of Swedish Senior High School Students: Gender Differences And Similarities. The Journal Of Sex Research, 54(4-5), 631-641.

Parish, S. J., Nappi, R. E., Krychman, M. L., Kellogg-Spadt, S., Simon, J. A., Goldstein, J. A., & Kingsberg, S. A. (2013). Impact Of Vulvovaginal Health On Postmenopausal Women: A Review Of Surveys On Symptoms Of Vulvovaginal Atrophy. International Journal Of Women's Health, 5, 437.

Rickert, V. I., Sanghvi, R., & Wiemann, C. M. (2002). Is Lack Of Sexual Assertiveness Among Adolescent And Young Adult Women A Cause For Concern?. Perspectives On Sexual And Reproductive Health, 178-183.

TROMOVITCH, P. (2020). A Correlational Investigation Of The Relationship Between Primary Anorgasmia, Prepubescent Sexual Experience, And Age Of First Love With Prosocial Personality. 同志社大学ハリス理化学研究報告= The Harris Science Review Of Doshisha University, 60(4), 222-228.