By Ksenia Sobchak

If you rarely travel light you'll no doubt take your whole array of sex toys on holiday with you, which is fine, until you're stopped by customs or your suitcase starts buzzing as you grab your last skinny latte before checking in.

There are many solutions out there that ensure even if you unpack in front of your parents (or your kids) they'll be none the wiser to watch your suitcase really holds. After recently returning from a dirty weekend away where our suitcase lost a wheel (and developed a huge hole) while dragging it through Canada Square, I wish I'd researched this first! As open minded as I am I still became a little embarrassed as sex toys spilled out onto the escalator, especially when my old, trusted, well-worn but in complete working order vibrator hit the metal steps. New sex toys are one thing; sex toys that look like they've had plenty of use are another!

After a little research I found some not so embarrassing pleasers!

Vibrating Rubber Duck

Fully waterproof and with an angled beak that will bring you to orgasm with or without soap, this little rubber ducky is innocent and cute. No one will suspect a thing! Try using it on your partner's perineum in the bath - absolute bliss!

Sleek Massagers

These don't even have to be vibrators. There are so many electric massagers on the market that you can easily find an innocent one that can be used down there. If anyone asks it's for that shoulder pain that just won't go away!

Key ring and Lipstick Vibrators

There are a lot of mini vibrators you can hang on your keys, such as a lipstick vibrator or a simple sleek bullet that makes you look as if you're a fan of Bond. Just don't make the mistake of letting your baby cousin play with your keys as children tend to put everything in their mouth- ewwww.

Vibrating Pants

These aren't just any pants, these are vibrating pants. They're not just for holidays, you can enjoy yourself wherever you are and make sure you're always satisfied. Personally I think these bring dry humping to a whole new level!

Toothbrush Attachment

With everyone going electric these days in the world of oral it was only a matter of time before someone realised the perfect opportunity. You can now get attachments for your electric toothbrush that direct the vibrations to the right spot. It would be rude not to try it.

USB Vibrator

This is the perfect present for the savvy business woman. A USB vibrator that looks just like a memory stick yet packs a hell of a punch. It can even be charged by inserting into a laptop - I'll be right back!