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Written by:✓

Barbara Santini
Psychologist and Sex and Relationships Advisor

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Veronika Matutyte
Medical Doctor

Fact Checked by:✓

Katie Lasson
Sex and Relationship Adviser

By Elena Ognivtseva

Who’s up for a history lesson today? Here’s something you don’t ponder very often—where did the dildo come from? It’s not a conversation you have over tea with friends, but it may be something you might wonder after experiencing a torrid session of self-pleasure in the tub. Indeed, the dildo seems like such a marvellously complex and yet very simple design. How did this creative and amusing adult toy come to us?

Ancient Dildo Secrets

Believe it or not, dildos actually date back well before modern civilization started. Don’t believe the myth that sex and sexual expression didn’t exist before the 1960s. No sir, there is a great deal of evidence that shows us that our great, great, great, great (and many more) grandfathers and grandmothers were horny old toads in their day. The first “dildo” on record (that is an object used for sexual pleasure) actually dates back to Upper Paleolithic period. That’s right, before cavemen and women learned how to speak modern languages, they were getting busy!

Some scientists believe that ancient artefacts, which look like poor quality batons, were actually masturbation aids. “Looking at the size, shape and…explicit symbolism,” Archaeologist Timothy Taylor states, “It seems disingenuous to avoid the most obvious interpretation.” So there you have it, the first physical evidence of cave woman (or man) masturbation dates back to some 30,000 years ago!

Fine Dildo Art and Other Erotic Witticisms

Even in fairly recent historical times, say the Greek and Roman empires, there is clear of evidence of many phallus-shaped objects being preserved through history. There is also archaeological proof of Egyptian sex toys. While we might be quick to identify these objects as tools related to an obscure sex worship religion, remember that for many centuries (and still today) sex and spirituality were often combined into one favourite pastime.

Previous generations of humankind were not only fond of sex, but very unashamed of it, and even put their favourite dildos into legitimate works of art. Greek vase art showcases dildos being used in an orgy, as well as in female solitary pleasure. They were on the right track we think! Another instance of ancient dildo art comes to us in the form of a vase depicting the dildo’s use in a threesome. (The book titled “Athenian Red Figure Vases: the Archaic Period” details many ancient findings) This case is dated back to B.C. times, meaning well before most mainstream religions were founded. There are also references to dildos in Lysistrata, a B.C. comedy by Aristophanes, and of course that jolly old perv William Shakespeare, in The Winter's Tale.

It’s quite easy to read the message of our forefathers—lighten up! There is no reason to be shy or ashamed about dildos, vibrators, rubber dongs and other sex toys. When you think about it, there is clearly nothing wrong with toys. And sex is a marvellous thing when it’s done right. So then, a “sex toy” is perhaps the most exciting invention since sliced bread!

The only thing that has really changed about dildos from back then to now, is the quality of the merchandise and the hygienic properties of these adult toys. And let’s not forget the functionality off course. They are far more effective, clean and discreet now than they ever have been!

We have plenty more to say about sex toys, so stay tuned for Part II of our Sex Toys Anthology in the next coming weeks on the Peaches and Screams Blog!