Is Your Relationship Facebook Bulletproof?

Content Verification

Written by:✓

Barbara Santini
Psychologist and Sex and Relationships Advisor

Medically Reviewed by:✓

Veronika Matutyte
Medical Doctor

Fact Checked by:✓

Katie Lasson
Sex and Relationship Adviser

By Ksenia Sobchak

When we marry or cohabitate we often picture our future as more of the same, with the butterfly feelings and wonder lust that sees us grinning from ear to ear in public places. However, as we settle into a routine, some of us come unstuck. Petty arguments start and all of a sudden those little nuances that attracted you in the first place now get on your nerves!

Many of us would love to have a bulletproof relationship as there’s no better feeling than knowing that you are part of pair. The security allows us to live our lives with confidence, sharing our toothbrushes in the younger days and our denture cleaner in the later ones!

How do you know if your relationship will stand up to the test of time? Divorce solicitors across the globe have discovered the easy pitfalls we can avoid so we don’t end up in the divorce courts.

Facebook Flirting

Most of the population have a Facebook account, and probably more women than men. Women love to keep in touch with friends and post photographs whilst men rarely complete their profile. However it’s perfectly natural to have a Facebook account, that’s not where the trouble lies. Since its popularity soared in 2007, solicitors now blame it for 50% of marriage breakdowns.

The Crush

It may feel wonderful when the boy you always had a crush on accepts your friends request, however how far will it go? Do you sometimes day dream about them or have you often wondered where they are? Do you regret never speaking out and letting them know your feelings? A friends request is easy enough but behind a monitor you can find you’re much more confident than you ever were in the classroom. If he starts communicating and commenting on statuses you could easily find yourself in hot water.

Remember that your feelings are a fantasy and if not for Facebook the only contact you may have had is a passing in the street where you could eyeball his beer belly and ask about his search for employment. Finally gaining recognition from someone you fancied can be an ego boost, but don’t forget the real life partner waiting for you in front of the TV!

Old Flames

Unless we grew up in a monastery many of us will have more than one old flame. As the years go by its easy to forget why these relationships ended. When you have an argument with your partner it may feel comforting to confide in an old flame that understands your personality, however will they really give you an objective view? Having others online that desire you may be a great ego boost but will those dirty emails really keep you warm at night when you’re faced with a Decree Absolute?

Secrets

Those who keep their contacts quite secret are at the highest risk of divorce, according to solicitors this is when the problems begin. Are you talking to someone online but have yet to tell your spouse? You may think you’re avoiding an argument or protecting their feelings however the fact that you’re keeping it a secret shows you’ve something to hide.

These are not the only reasons a relationship breaks down due to social networking. Studies show that when both parts of a couple own a Facebook account, the boredom within the relationship can escalate. Partners see each other every day, adding to this the banality of “your wife just liked Zoe’s picture” can have catastrophic consequences, as we all need to keep a little mystery alive!