A Couple's Guide To Bondage Play
A Couple's Guide To Bondage Play
There is evidence of BDSM practices (erotic flagellation) found as far back as the 5th century BC. Today, with the popularity of the "50 Shades of Grey” trilogy, couples who may not have considered playing with BDSM before are now more interested in exploring this once taboo subject.
What is BDSM?
According to Wikipedia, “BDSM is a variety of erotic practices involving dominance and submission, role-playing, restraint, and other interpersonal dynamics.” Also called a power exchange, this refers to partners who consent to take on asymmetrical roles, with one person being dominant who wields sexual control over the submissive or receiving partner. Often, this can take on the form of erotic role play, such as master and slave, where the master will play with forms of bondage and discipline, which is both psychological as well as physical.
Why couples may want to introduce this role playing into their relationship will ultimately vary, based on their personal circumstances, fantasies, preferences and limits. Perhaps the man is the boss at
work and wants to free himself from that dynamic, so he chooses to play the opposite role of the submissive. Or, perhaps the woman wants to gain power in the relationship, so she plays with dominance. Couples may also take turns with each role so both can experience each position. But, ultimately, couples choose to explore BDSM to expand their relationship to new levels of eroticism, fulfill erotic fantasies, to allow themselves to “let go” sexually and emotionally, and to role play the power structure in the relationship.
When playing with bondage, it is important to keep your play fun, safe and adventurous. Remember that communication is key and to always use a safe word like “RED” to stop the play immediately, for in some fantasies “oh no, stop” actually means “yes, please continue”. Communication is also important so both partners know they are consenting to this type of play before the games begin. Being held down during sex can be an extremely erotic experience. But keep it safe by agreeing on a safe word in advance.
It is also important to learn about the activites you want to try before actually doing them. Bondage and other types of BDSM play can be dangerous if you are not skilled or don't play safe. Try to find some local workshops to learn the ropes or buy books and educational DVDs on the subjects you are interested in learning about.
Bondage Restraint Toy Types
Rope is one of the most popular toys for bondage but also the most difficult to learn how to use. Shibari rope gurus take years honing their skills, so rope is not the ideal toy for beginners. You will probably want to take some classes before exploring rope bondage.
Hand Cuffs are a best selling restraint. They come in many different types from furry to metal cuffs as well as leather and nylon varieties. Furry cuffs are soft and easy to use, making them great for beginners.
Collars and leashes are used in dominance and submission play, where the submissive partner wears a collar and is controlled by their owner by a leash. They can also be used for pet or doggie play scenerios.
Blindfolds are a lot of fun and fall under the lighter side of bondage play. They remove the sense of sight allowing all the other senses to be heightened. They are a great beginner's toy and help create an element of suspense.
Hoods are used for sensory deprivation and are more for heavy bondage play. They allow the wearer to fully immerse themselves into the play.
Gags are used to muffle the wearer's voice or screams of pleasure. They create can a sense of helplessness and further submission.
Bondage Kits are perfect for beginners starting out because you can get many different toys in one. Our most popular bondage kits are Bed Restraints Systems that turn your bed into a sensual bondage playground.
Sex Furniture and Sex Swings
Using an ordinary pillow to prop up your lover's butt may be all you need for a great sex life. However, there are sex pillows and furniture that are specifically designed to allow lovers to get into better positions during sex, as well as make those positions more comfortable and less fatiguing.
There are inflatable beds, chairs and pillows by Pipedreams that are specially designed for kinky bondage fun featuring built in straps. There are also sex pillows, furniture and balls that have dildos strapped on them, turning them into sex toys.
Liberator shapes are designed to help couples achieve Kama Sutra positions easily. The Wedge is perfect for missionary and doggie style positions. Liberator shapes also lock together like the Wedge/Ramp combo (shown left) allowing for even greater positioning during sex. Some Liberator shapes also feature bondage connectors and cuffs such as their Black label series.
Sex Swings and Slings
Sex swings are the ultimate in playful adult fun. They allow you to have weightless sex in various porn star positions, and are easily adjusted for height and size. Our most popular sex swing is the Wild Sex Collection Spinning Sex Swing that spins 360 degrees, giving couples a wide range of motion for effortless sex positions. Other types of swings can be hung from a door jam, making them easy and quick to put up and take down, when you are in a spontaneous mood.
Sex slings comes in various shapes and are designed for getting into different positions. Some connect the ankles allowing her to spread her legs wider and farther back so he can penetrate deeper. Others make doggie style and other positions that facilitate G spot pleasure easier to perform.