DOES SEX HURT? MAKE IT LESS PAINFUL AND MORE PLEASURABLE

Learn how to make sex between you and your partner more pleasurable by identifying the causes of painful sex, including tight hymen, low lubrication, and how to solve them.

Sex is a pleasurable experience, though this may not apply to everybody. Some people find it so uncomfortable to have sex as they feel much pain. There are various reasons for this to occur, including hormonal, physical, psychological, and emotional issues. Most people experience pain during their first-time sex, though there are ways to make it less painful.  Let us discuss possible reasons that can cause pain during sex and make it a pleasurable experience.

Reasons for Painful Sex

A Tight Hymen

The hymen is a thin membrane surrounding the vaginal entrance. It can either be thick or thin. If the hymen is stretchy, you'll likely experience less pain during your first sex. However, if it is not stretchy, you'll experience pain during sex.  This may cause a bit of bleeding as the hymen stretches during intercourse. This is the most common source of pain during first-time sex. If your partner has got a larger penis, then don't worry. The vagina can stretch high and wide during sex and birth.  A too-large penis is usually not a cause of pain. Nonetheless, when the penis is very deep, it may cause some discomfort.

Insufficient Lubricant and Infections

Due to inward and outward movement, lubricant is vital as it helps to reduce friction. This may cause more pain than pleasure. A lubricant such as KY helps you during courtship. Sometimes vaginal infections such as yeast infections may result from taking antibiotics and cause discomfort during sexual intercourse. Fibroid, pelvic inflammatory diseases, and sex too soon after birth may also be other causes. Some conditions may cause itching to the area.

Relationship Problems

If things are not running smoothly in your relationship, they tend to affect your partner's psychology and end up ruining things in bed and making sex painful. When there is anxiety and fear from your partner, they cause vaginal muscles to clamp down, causing the pain. Always make sure your woman is relaxed.

How To Make Sex Less Painful and More Pleasurable

There is no guaranteed way for a completely pain-free sex experience for the first-timer, although some things are crucial in making it less painful. Here are some vital factors to consider having sex for the first time.

Always Discuss Sex with Your Partner

A partner is someone you are going to share everything about yourself with. This includes your secrets and body as well. You don't have to be afraid of anything when it comes to your partner. Always tell him how you feel every time you have sex with him. Make sure you are honest in whatever you say to your partner to make him understand what you like and what you don't and in which manner you will be comfortable with. Talking to your partner will help reduce anxiety, which will contribute to more pleasure in the bedroom.

Set Realistic Expectation

Most people always wish to have a sweet memory of how their first sex will be. They will end up setting higher standards that the partner should meet.  It is normal to have high expectations, but always try to be realistic with yourself. Some people go to the extent of having a mental checklist that will guide them when they are ready. They also plan on where they want it to happen. When planning, make sure you are realistic to yourself and your partner. When you set your limits too high, and it turns out as not expected, it eventually ruins your pleasure. If you are nervous about sex, try to get a sex therapist or a counselor to tell you the underlying problem.

Warm-Up Beforehand

Foreplay is important before the real deal. Women take a bit longer to get into the moods, unlike men. You need to make sure your vagina is well lubricated to avoid friction during penetration. Foreplay maxes you feel relaxed and comfortable for the act. You can start by kissing, oral sex, and touching all over or manual stimulation. Let it be slow and gentle and have no sudden movement. Becoming aroused before you begin intercourse increases lubrication in the vagina.

Don’t Be in A Hurry

You may expect how things should go between you and your partner but try not to take things faster. Always be patient with yourself and your partner as well. Don't take how you should feel too seriously.  Take a minute and relax so that you can have time for both of you to get aroused. Show your partner where you want to be touched at how you wish him to do it to you. When you’re both ready, your partner can ease into you using their finger to press in. Always find a pace that fits both of you. Don’t be too fast or slow.

Choose A Nice Location

The place you choose should be suitable for both of you. It should be a place where you can both feel relaxed. Often a bed is a perfect place for the act. Having access to basic amenities where you can control temperature may sound cool as well. You can flavor up by adding music, lighting, and personal touch to help set the moods.

Using Lubricants and Dilators

Another idea of having less pain is using lubricant to massage the entrance of the vagina opening. These should be done every day for a few weeks and help desensitize the area. Numbing agents such as lidocaine are helpful as it helps to numb some of the discomforts. Make sure your man has a condom so as not to be numb as well.  Alternatively, you can get yourself a set of 3 graded dilators. The larger one should be around the size of a man's penis. Use one dilator every day until you can insert it comfortably. You can start with the small one advancing to the large one. Help helps control fear and pain of penetration.

The Bottom Line

Sex is supposed to bring pleasure to both of you, but if you find out that you’re experiencing pain, then it’s good to seek medical attention. Pain during sex may be caused by hormonal, psychological, and physical issues. Always be free to talk to your partner if you experience unusual pain during sex.