8 WAYS TO INCREASE YOUR SEXUAL SELF-ESTEEM
Do you have low sexual self-esteem but looking to increase it? Below are some tips on how to increase your sexual self-esteem.
Most people don't want to face the reality that who they choose to date or have sex with says a lot about how they feel about themselves and what they think they deserve. The more you strengthen your self-esteem directly relates to you and your sexuality, and the more you make wiser decisions, the better your sexual experiences will become. Here are some ways to take your sexual self-esteem to a higher level.
Look At Yourself Naked Every Day.
The first thing you should do is make a point to look at yourself naked every day. Intentionally stare at yourself in a full-length mirror while declaring how fabulous you are. Take it up a notch by saying out all the things that make you distinctively you. it may feel weird or silly to you, especially if you are not used to it. The more you get used to affirming your body, the more confident you become and the more confident you'll be whether you're having sex in the dark or the light.
Communicate Honestly About Sexuality Beforehand With Your Partner
Once you better understand your needs, body, and history, you may feel more comfortable talking with your partner about what you want and don't want. However, it's important to communicate about this before engaging in any sexual act as Jozkowski & Wiersma (2015) suggested. This may help solidify an understanding of your boundaries and kinks you may feel safe doing with your partner. Conversations about sexuality should happen before you go to bed with someone.
Recall Your Best Sexual Memories.
It can be helpful to think back to what you did that you would and wouldn't do again. it could cause you to overlook the good if you dwell on the bad, but it could also taint your sexual perspective. It's a good idea to take time to recall your best sexual memories and write them down. Reflect on what made those moments good and how they made you feel. Think about the compliments you've been given regarding your performance and appeal. According to Löckenhoff & Carstensen (2004) recalling all the good moments helps to keep your memories in balance. Don't give the negative stuff your energy. Whenever you are ready to let something go, you can write it down and why it is time to release it and burn it. While that doesn't make the recollections go away for good, it is an exercise that will make you feel like you've got some power back, and that's a confidence booster.
Cultivate Sexual Rituals
You should try and do things that help you center on your sexuality and its power. For instance, you could engage in some erotic self-focus or meditate alone before having sex as Brotto & Klein (2010) suggested. Whatever it is, ensure it's something that makes you feel sexy and wonderful. Pick a practice reminding you of how special you are because the more you believe it, the harder it will be to let anyone make you think otherwise.
Do Not Fake It
Love yourself and your body enough to commit to not faking sexual satisfaction. Be confident enough to express when you are pleased and not but do it gently. The right partner will want you to be pleased, and they will respect you for speaking up. Your sexual self-esteem will increase when you are encouraged to be open and honest.
Sex Journal
The purpose of journaling is to recall certain memories and gain some clarity about what you remember. Whether you are trying to figure out why you choose the partners you do, how to come up with some sexual deal breakers, how to break unhealthy patterns, or what you like and dislike about foreplay, sex, and after-play, setting aside some time once a week to do nothing, sex journal can be a way to elevate your sexual self-esteem because when you see things clearly, you move differently.
Conduct a Vaginal Self-Exam
You'd be surprised to find out how many people don't know what their vaginas look like. Be proactive about your genital health and well-being, and get accustomed to your lady part. It's good to conduct a vaginal self-exam at least monthly. It can get you used to what your vulva and vagina look like to stay on top of any potential abnormalities. It can make it easier to give your partner a guided tour and increase your sexual self-esteem if you are familiar with all that goes on down there.
Take More Baths
Baths are important in many ways. They help to calm and relax you. They can boost your immunity while improving your heart's health. According to Shibamoto (2010), baths are also able to balance your hormones while moisturizing your skin. As far as sexual self-esteem is concerned, soaking in a tub that contains essential oils and rose petals as you listen to soft music makes you feel feminine. Do your body and sexual self-image a favor and treat yourself to a tub soak at least once a week. There is something sexy about taking baths, and it increases your sexual self-esteem.
The Bottom Line
Discovering your sexual desires and building your sexual confidence might feel like a never-ending endeavor, but that shouldn't make you panic. Be patient with yourself. You'll be able to uncover your history, wants, and needs regarding sex with time. Communicate the journey you're going on with your partner, and try to stay open and curious. everything will work in your favor, and your sexual self-esteem will be boosted as long as you're kind and don't pressure yourself to do things you don't want to do.
References
Brotto, L. A., & Klein, C. (2010). Psychological factors involved in women’s sexual dysfunctions. Expert Review of Obstetrics & Gynecology, 5(1), 93-104.
Jozkowski, K. N., & Wiersma, J. D. (2015). Does drinking alcohol before sexual activity influence college students’ consent?. International Journal of Sexual Health, 27(2), 156-174.
Löckenhoff, C. E., & Carstensen, L. L. (2004). Socioemotional selectivity theory, aging, and health: The increasingly delicate balance between regulating emotions and making tough choices. Journal of personality, 72(6), 1395-1424.
Shibamoto, K., Mochizuki, M., & Kusuhara, M. (2010). Aromatherapy in anti-aging medicine. Anti-Aging Medicine, 7(6), 55-59.