TALK THIS WAY: DIRTY TALKING TIPS

Dirty talking is adding verbal play and utterances to the actual sexual activities either ongoing or before the sexual activities happening. This becomes a powerful combination that is key to a fun and explosive sex life. Dirty talking techniques lace the already destined sexual activity with suspense, fantasy, anticipation, and tension that leads to the partners craving each other wildly.

It also creates and allows expressing all desires that have not been expressed before and also serves as seduction and as a command for activities. It is also seen as a way to give and receive sexual consent. Below is a guide on how to talk dirty to your partner to spice your relationship.

Dirty Talking On The Phone [Phone Sex]

According to Hertlein & Ancheta (2014), phone sex is a great tool for helping thriving long-distance relationships to work and last. While apart from each other, the two partners can induce erotic and verbal sexual exchange to help keep the flame of their relationship alive. Due to privacy, this phone sex could use an aspect of a shared language on the two partners’ understanding to make it more fun and enticing. By verbalizing the innermost desires to each other, it will help keep the flame and when the reunion finally occurs it will be very exciting and filled with adrenaline.

How to Effectively Talk Dirty

Give A Simple And Direct Description

Simply describing what someone is doing gives a clear and elaborate picture and a clear understanding of everything, as Ponterotto (2006) suggested. This is easy to expose those dark secrets and desires that have never been disclosed to your partner.

This is a fail safe technique where one party sends a raunchy text over the phone not knowing how their partner on the other side of the phone react after reading the message. While they take long to reply or after anxiety has taken over the person, they fight the urge to send another text saying that it was not them who sent it. The ideal thing is to let the receiver of the message read it and then get an opportunity to reply with a raunchier text or something similar to show that they are on the same vibe.

Prepare Phrases To Be Used

Once you have initiated this kind of sex connection, it needs to be maintained and used regularly to keep its originality. This implies that the two partners need to have phrases to use while going at it. Plan on how you will both go about it and exchange ideas on how to further the scope of dirty talking statements to make it more interesting.

Make Your Way Up The Raunchiness Pole Of Sorts

A person should start with the more subdued words that are available if they are new to dirty talking perks. This helps reduce levels of uncomfortability and weirdness scale. Once they have gotten the hang of it, they are allowed to scale down further to the point of pure vulgarity since both partners are already inducted into the dirty-talking skills and they find nothing weird with being vulgar. Some people have a certain limit for allowance of vulgarity and it starts to make the partners more uncomfortable. Therefore, a person has to experiment to see how far it will go.

Define What Is Off Limits

During dirty talking and phone sex, certain areas are mentioned and they will cause uncomfortability for the persons involved. The couple is advised to sit down and come up with a list of the wording and activities that are allowed and the ones that are sealed as a no go zone. This is done by looking at a list of body parts and sexual activities and agreeing on the ones that make them comfortable.

Read Erotic Novels Together

This method of introducing sexual verbalism into the relationship is great because it shows and gives a description of how to go through and implement the subsequent sexual activities. According to Katz (2007), reading erotic articles together gives the couple a way of discovering what works for them and what doesn’t.

Role Play

It can be a fun way of not taking full responsibility for the words uttered because it’s not the “character” that is doing all the work for you. It may be a good way of exposing the sides of the couple that have been kept inside them. Role play pushes the couple to move out of their comfort zones and try something they would never try under normal conditions like kinky sex, as Kukla (2018) stated.

Be Aware Of Voice Tone

Try making your tone soft when talking to your partner. Lowering the voice can be a turn-on for your partner. Assimilation of a new voice in the bedroom will also lead to arousal since it helps in soothing awkwardness.

Practicing Outside The Bedroom First

Gaining expertise out of the bedroom set can be beneficial because it works very well for the couple. This entails the suggestive whispering or slipping a note over the table of what is going to happen next to build up tension and excitement.

Getting comfortable and used to dirty talks outside the covers reduces the act of feeling weird and awkward when your partner mentions some words because they are already used to hearing them in the outside environment. It also gives space and opportunity for the two partners to discuss what works and doesn’t work for them to agree on what is best for them.

Conclusion

The most important thing to remember is that no one is perfect when it comes to talking dirty regardless of their knowledge and exposure so it’s a trial-and-error method and everyone is allowed to do it and pick the trail that suits them best.

Dirty talking should be a form of deriving pleasure from each other before actually engaging in sexual intercourse. It is a good way to show that both the partners are thinking of each other and find pleasure in each other.

References

Hertlein, K. M., & Ancheta, K. (2014). Advantages And Disadvantages Of Technology In Relationships: Findings From An Open-Ended Survey. Qualitative Report, 19(11).

Katz, J. (2007). The Invention Of Heterosexuality. University Of Chicago Press.

Kukla, R. (2018). That’s What She Said: The Language Of Sexual Negotiation. Ethics, 129(1), 70-97. Ponterotto, J. G. (2006). A Brief Note On The Origins, Evolution, And Meaning Of The Qualitative Research Concept Thick Description. The Qualitative Report, 11(3), 538-549.