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As I age, there are many things I wish I would have done differently. If possible, I could go back to the past; I would have handled my dating and sex life with a better perspective than before. I hear similar weird stories from my younger colleagues about their romantic lives each passing day. Although times have changed, the misconceptions about love and intimacy tend to relate. 

With advancements in technology, dating has never been this easy. People can find lovers through digital apps and even learn about sex on some websites. Teens are exposed to sex-related issues and romance at an early age. The modern era has not altered the misconceptions, myths, anxieties, and stories concerning sex and love in the younger generation. Most things I hear the youth talking about relate to my teenage years. I have learned and experienced many dating issues in my 20s that I wish I could change. Therefore, sharing my personal experiences with teens is the best way to express what I would like to do differently if taken back in time. Here are some things I would tell younger me or teens to better their current love and sex life.

There Is Nothing Like Mixed Signals in Relationships.

In relationships, you might find yourself frequently thinking about whether your partner loves you. Do they have true feelings for you? Are they trying to play with your emotions? Confusion about your connection and attachment to someone arises due to multiple reasons. Mixed signals are one of the major red flags in a relationship. When you see your lover with new weird habits, it's better to face it head-on rather than avoiding it or forcing them to confess their feelings. Address the concerns based on their behaviors in open communication. Honesty and trust are essential for a healthy partnership.

Forget About Lovers Who Left Your Life

Every person has that one girl or boy that slipped out of their life in a time they needed them. One common thing is that most people tend to hold on to feelings for lovers who got away from their life, especially young people. They can be your first love or the one who took your virginity. However, focusing on them won't bring them back into your life. Rather than wasting your time and energy trying to reconnect with them, I advise you spend more time with those around your life. Find love in new places or people and avoid comparing your partner with previous ones.

Never Rush into Sex Or Dating

As a teen, you may experience peer pressure and want to try out new practices. For the record, most of my friends had their first love or sex after pressuring each other based on their closest friend experiences and lies. I fell for the trap too, and had my first sex in my early 20s. Peer pressure among teens is real and will always be there. Never rush into making love because you have seen or heard your classmates doing sex. Take as much time as you need. Sex and romance will always be there, and there is a right time for it. Listen to your instincts, be strong-willed in the acts as you choose. Sex and relationships can make or break you. Ensure you have full consent and agreement before trying any sexual activity. 

Fake Love and Heartbreaks Exist

Have you ever loved someone such that you felt that life could never be the same if they ever left you? You are not alone in that; I did too. The fact is that some people will get into your life to exploit or use you. Be careful in who you fall for or get into intimate relationships with. Heartbreaks are inevitable and may induce worse experiences, but you can still find true love even after the worst heartbreak. Never allow any man or woman to play with your emotions. Before being in a relationship with anybody, it's better to take some time to know each other. 

You Can't Forget Your Ex-Love by Dating a New Person Immediately or His Friend

One of the dating mistakes I made was seeking relief from my boy's best friend after our breakup. As an act of revenge, I chose to sleep with his best friend and have an intimate relationship. It only took us two months before I had another breakup. After breaking up with your partner, it's ideal to take some time off to cool your emotions and brain. Heartbreaks are stressful, but you can't get over them by jumping from one partner to another. On the contrary, it worsens your conditions as you get hurt more. Your emotions and feelings matter. Avoid using love as a revenge mechanism in any situation. 

Safe Sex Is the Best Sex

As a teen, your spirit of adventure and pleasure is usually high. Younger people tend to indulge in risky sex practices. With easy access to explicit material, teens can be highly convinced to try sexual activities without protection. Unwanted pregnancies, STDS, and HIV are real. The more you engage in unmindful sex, the higher your risks of infection. Having fun is good, but having fun the right way is better for your health. 


As a teen, I had no clue of many things when trying out sex. However, with experience and observation, I have matured into a better person with a more positive approach and perspective on romance and sex. From my personal experiences shared above, the younger generation can apply the tips to improve their sex lives and avoid similar occurrences of horrible love and sex problems.