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THE FUN OF TEASING AND DENIAL

THE FUN OF TEASING AND DENIAL

Content Verification

Katie Lasson
Written by:

Sex and Relationship Adviser
Veronika Matutyte
Medically Reviewed by:

Medical Doctor
Barbara Santini
Fact Checked by:

Psychologist and Sex and Relationships Advisor

✨ Key Points in a Nutshell ✨

    • 🔥 Teasing builds excitement and anticipation like nothing else!

    • 💋 Denial is the playful art of "almost there" moments.

    • 🎭 Perfect for deepening intimacy and spicing up bedroom antics.

  • ✨ Take turns for balanced power dynamics and loads of fun.

💡 Key Advice and Tips from Our Experts 💡

    • 🔑 Communication is everything – talk about limits and desires upfront.

    • 🎯 Start slow – teasing is more about the journey than the destination.

    • 🕵️ Explore toys and tools for an added layer of fun.

  • 🌈 Make it playful, consensual, and filled with laughter!

Having sex is a real treat. It might seem like we are deep-sea divers, plunging right down to the bottom to get our ultimate treasure. Enjoyment becomes a dot on the map, something we race to get as quickly as possible, certain that the prize at the end will be delicious and rewarding. That last aim, an explosive orgasm, seems to be the only thing that can keep us distracted in those moments of primal need. This article highlights the fun of teasing and denial.

Going for the gold might be a good thing; there is plenty to be said for looking at your sexual life from a different perspective. It is possible to lose focus on the finer nuances of making that beautiful love when you succumb to the wild passion of speeding toward a climax. One should view sex more like a lovely walk through an unmarked forest rather than a grueling 5k race. Not all sex should be bland and sugary with John Mayer's music in the background. In bed, you may indulge in various sexy activities, including intense foreplay, impact play, new and exciting toys, and the art of the tease. The available sex toys have made it easy to get sexual stimulation even when alone as Silverberg & Kaufman (2016) explained. Moreover, Kreuter et al. (2011) explained that foreplay makes one relax and enjoy sex.

In the bedroom, it is possible that tickling and denial might be an unexplored areas. After all, isn't it a little cruel to deny your partner their rights? Teasing and denial may help you develop every moment of pleasure and let your lover experience unprecedented levels that only alone can liberate them from. In addition, sultry taunts and denials are a welcome addition to anyone's nighttime repertoire. A little bit of tease and denial may take your sex life to new heights, whether you're poly, vanilla, or elbow-deep in a dominant or submissive relationship.

Why Are Teasing and Denial So Great?

When you add an element of denial to the mix, you ignite a longing for yourself and your lover that you may not have experienced before. Think of it like the anticipation that grows before your favorite series gets a sequel. There is nothing wrong with reading a series in one sitting, but there is something to be said about waiting for another book to come out. Finally, you're on the verge of bursting as you ponder what's to follow. You're just getting started when you begin kissing and hugging each other. Instead of going directly in between their legs, look around the typical erogenous places first. Touch their inner thigh with your fingernails, kiss and lick their neck before nearing the ears, or lightly touch your fingers along their most vulnerable areas. Before getting started, your companion will be sweating bullets. Teasing and denial take center stage when penetration is an option. Alternate between deep and shallow thrusts to keep your partner guessing. There are several ways to approach this, including nine shallow and one deep thrust and eight and two deep. Without a steady beat, your partner will get glimpses of paradise.

Dirty Talk 

It is not only about physical contact. It is also a great technique to enhance your nasty verbal game when it comes to teasing and denial. Harris (1995) stated that dirty talking is one of the most distinguishing features of sex. When you add some little bit of teaser to the mix, you open up a whole new universe of filthy conversation. You may ask them to beg, tease them about the things you won't give them (no matter how much they want them), and tell them how you will delight them later. In addition, it is a terrific opportunity to learn new words and phrases for your bedroom conversation. Playing this way is so enjoyable. Moreover, asking them what they want from you may seem almost illegally hot when you are withholding them. You know you have found the right person when you hear your partner's breathy voice telling you precisely what they want. Try a little bit of this before sex. Be confident; whisper in her ear and you will have her asking for it just before you are finished. Build your toying and denial fantasies from the start.

The Denial of Orgasm

According to Airaksinen (2019), orgasm denial is a prevalent dynamic in BDSM settings, sadomasochism, which may pique your interest if all of this has whetted your hunger for greater denial. You may take your partner's enjoyment in a new direction by repeatedly pushing them to the brink of their comfort zone and not letting them climax before you decide they can. There are several ways in which orgasm denial might manifest itself. Some of the most common methods for denying orgasms are: using various stimulation techniques, speeds, and pressures to bring your partner as near as possible to orgasm without causing them to burst out in a fit of ecstasy. In addition, restricting your partner's ability to make physical contact with you or themselves may assist trigger an orgasm, as can halting all intimate contact when they come near, pausing for them to calm down, and then starting it up again. Orgasm denial is a powerful feeling, even if it may first seem to be a painful one for your partner. Repetitively, flooding your spouse with static before an orgasm may really be more pleasant than a single expected orgasm because of the overwhelming gaps we experience before an orgasm.

Conclusion

Orgasm denial may lead you and your companion to lose interest in the ultimate goal. Even while orgasms are hailed as the ultimate sex experience by our society, the fact is that all other aspects of sex are also pleasurable. Orgasms are wonderful, but so does the process by which one arrives at them. After a while, you will begin to see that there is nothing to worry about. It is just pure pleasure. The more you keep practicing the art of teasing and denial, the better you become at it. There will be no stopping, fun after the fun. 

References

Airaksinen, T. (2019). Sadomasochistic Desire. In Vagaries of Desire: A Collection of Philosophical Essays (pp. 183-201). Brill.

Harris, D. (1995). Dirty Talk. The Baffler, (7), 91-97.

Kreuter, M., Taft, C., Siösteen, A., & Biering-Sørensen, F. (2011). Women's sexual functioning and sex life after spinal cord injury. Spinal cord49(1), 154-160.Silverberg, C., & Kaufman, M. (2016). The ultimate guide to sex and disability: For all of us who live with disabilities, chronic pain, and illness. Cleis Press.

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