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WHAT IS A RUINED ORGASM? HOW CAN IT INCREASE PLEASURE?

What Is A Ruined Orgasm? How Can It Increase Pleasure?

  • by Jekaterina Gussarova
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What Is A Ruined Orgasm? How Can It Increase Pleasure?

  • by Jekaterina Gussarova

Content Verification

Tatyana Dyachenko
Written by:
Tatyana Dyachenko
Psychologist and Relationship Adviser
Veronika Matutyte
Medically Reviewed by:
Veronika Matutyte
Medical Doctor
Katie Lasson
Fact Checked by:
Katie Lasson
Sex and Relationship Adviser

🤩 Key Takeaways 🤩

🔑 Ruined orgasms add a delicious layer of suspense and build-up to your pleasure. They can heighten sensitivity and increase the intensity of climax.


💡 It's not just about the orgasm – it's about the journey. The anticipation makes the release even more satisfying.


🔄 Experimentation is key. What works for one person might not work for another – find your unique rhythm.

💖 Top Tips from Our Experts 💖

🎯 Don’t be afraid to get creative. Exploring new techniques can turn ordinary moments into extraordinary ones!

👀 Pay attention to your partner’s body language – sometimes the best pleasure comes from unspoken signals.

🕒 Take your time. Build up slowly, and enjoy every second of the ride.

Most people complicate methods for incorporating kink and BDSM in their lives. Why not begin with one of the simplest ways, orgasm? An orgasm can be of various forms to increase pleasure, for example, a ruined one. 

A ruined orgasm may not necessarily prompt pleasure. Not all sex sessions should end in a mind-blowing climax. Some individuals merely prefer a ruined orgasm to elicit excitement. This discussion contains all you need to know about this type of orgasm and how it increases enjoyment. Understanding a ruined orgasm

What’s a Ruined Orgasm?

A ruined orgasm comes with stimulation that takes you to peak sexual stimulation but stops before getting to climax, thus said to be ruined. It's mostly attached to power dynamic elements and control executed in BDSM and kink plays. The playmates can explore masochism or sadism to fulfill the receiver's desires. Therefore, a ruined orgasm entails aspects, including power, domination, and control. If the ideal individuals understand what it means, be sure the bondage games will be super erotic. For safe bondage play, consent from both partners is essential to establish boundaries, provide guidelines, and discuss particular things before the experience is underway.

Why a Ruined Orgasm?

Many people take a ruined orgasm experience as a fetish and get excitement and gratification from a pleasure denial practice. They may be correct since some people can sometimes require a little denial. In kink plays, the dominants are usually attracted by a ruined orgasm because of being in control. It makes them satisfied. Also, it's fun and rewarding. A dominant partner can do it in various ways, including using their controlling power or humiliation to ruin an orgasm. Nevertheless, their motivation is majorly to take charge of the receiver’s safety. On the other hand, the giver’s top motivation is to offer a powerful experience consensually desired by the receiver. 

The biggest appeal is a submissive's loss of control. It impresses many individuals because it helps release the daily stress they undergo. A ruined orgasm is also fun due to the humiliation experience, which enables engaging in what’s said not to deserve pleasure. People enjoy the experience differently. For instance, some subs wouldn't prefer the humiliation factor but love being in control. Others aren't into control but giving care and service, accomplishing the bottom's urges. That implies individuals are different; hence the need for communication during bondage plays.

Ruined Orgasm Types

We have two types; partially and fully ruined orgasms.

Fully- involves complete ruining of the bottom’s orgasm.

Partially- an orgasm is achieved but with less satisfaction or intensity because the giver meddled.

Is The Orgasm More Pleasurable?

Perhaps you wish to know how the ruined orgasm feels. Well, several people give varied experiences. It’s no surprise because our bodies are different. Suppose you’d want to relate to the feeling, have a look at the following situations.

Unexpectedly getting caught while masturbating.

Getting to the climax and your vibrator goes off.

Getting a call in the middle of a porn video on your phone.

How does it feel? It may feel frustrating or disappointing and still connected to the buzzing sensation from your play. A favorite comment from one fan linked a ruined orgasm to waiting for pizza delivery for so long only to drop it everywhere on the floor after getting it.

Getting a Ruined Orgasm With More Pleasure

What can you do to achieve it? The major technique is the start and stop method by simply initiating sensitization to your sweet spots and stopping leading to no more stimulation that can cause an orgasm. It could be in your hands or your partner's. 

You can only deliver interrupted sessions of arousal and stimulation, possibly resulting in a partial or fully ruined orgasm. It’s good to always start by talking it over with your partner. Engage them in a thorough discussion before the experience to make it consensual. Remember to carry vibrators or other sex aids and ensure the encounter is adventurous.

Experts recommend adding some emotional BDSM elements to the start and stop strategy. They can bring various feelings, including loss of control, frustration, anger, embarrassment, and humiliation, to completely ruin your orgasm. For instance, a dom can arouse and sensitize you to almost reaching an orgasm but humiliate you by a statement or words that ruin it all. Another way is to distract your mind with intrusive thoughts. A person can walk into your room when almost reaching the climax, and your body continues reacting, leaving you without feeling the pleasure.

How Ruined Orgasms Differs From Edging and Orgasm Denial

Edging seeks to extend or delay an orgasm, but in a ruined type, there's physical pleasure depreciation, which is also pleasurable, especially for people that understand it better. In other words, edging emphasizes on extending gratification, whereas a ruined orgasm takes you to the edge before stopping and completely denying the chance to orgasm. The three orgasms, denial, edging, and ruined, have a common factor- stimulation, power-play, plus orgasm control. If you can incorporate all the three in your BDSM plays, they can help explore dominance or submission properly. They’re also easier to add to our games.

The Bottom Line

Domination, control, and power are all that matter in a ruined orgasm play. You only require the right partner to achieve your perceived pleasure from this super sexy performance. If you’re a beginner, ensure nothing is complex in this. You can read the above to familiarize yourself with the theory part before making it practical. You may also want to introduce the same in your relationship. People apply ruined orgasms in the sexual sessions or kink plays for different reasons. Communication is immensely vital to moderate the session. Therefore, talk to your partner and establish a guideline that will help elicit all the fun from the experience.


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