14 COMMON MISTAKES MEN MAKE IN BED
Whether knowledgeable or not, men and women alike make mistakes in bed. However, men mostly fall into this while having sex. Herein are some common mistakes men make in bed, including rushing sex, being predictable, and being overdependent.
When it comes to sex, most men believe that they are the best. However, this is not the case. Constantly men seek validation for not only self-confidence but also to prove a point to themselves and others. How good a man is in bed will be determined by the woman. This doesn’t mean that the woman doesn’t have a part to play, but the man has the bigger role. Some men are clueless when it comes to sex and only think about vaginal penetration without paying attention to other factors. A man might be good in bed, but no one is immune to mistakes. Here are some of the common mistakes men make in bed.
Poor Grooming Habits
A guy might look good in appearance and the way he dresses. However, in bed, it all comes down to manscaping. A man should trim or shave his pubic hair. We all have our preferences, and even some women suggest that some pubic hair is good. However, it won’t hurt just to give yourself a trim to enhance your body’s appearance, and this will mean you are hygienic in all aspects. Also, Brody et al. (2021) stated that it is important to clean yourself before hitting the bedroom.
Over-Enthusiastic Kissing
This is yet another mistake men make without their knowledge. You might be in the heat of the moment and you want to make the best of it, take things slow. Avoid kissing your partner with too much zest covering them with saliva all over their mouth in the name of kissing. Do this mildly and pay attention to other forms of foreplay to get them in the mood.
Zero or Insufficient Foreplay
Unlike men, women are more sophisticated in bed. No matter how much you are turned on as a man, keep in mind that foreplay is a must; and not just those 2-5 minutes of foreplay then you are down to thrusting. According to Kreuter et al. (2011), foreplay makes one relax and enjoy sex. Take her slow and keep her at the moment. Deploy the scenes you see in those Telenovela romantic shows. The last thing you want is to be a turn-off in bed. Sex is not all about penetrating. Foreplay has a major role to play; it is what you do to get her in the mood, what turns her on and this will also make you harder and more aroused. So before you bring out your pecker to play, make sure she is properly turned on.
Extreme Thrusting
Keep in mind that nobody is rushing you in bed not unless it is a quickie in a weird place. However, men have to know that the key to good sex is not all about how fast you go or how much you pound her. It is all about the feeling you give her, does she orgasm or not? Slow down before you speed up.
Lasting For a Short While
This is the biggest if not the most common mistake most men make. As a man, there is no worse feeling than being dubbed “one minute man”. You want positive feedback from your woman and a feeling of confidence after a job well done. To last longer, consider things such as foreplay and different techniques. The foreplay will extend the sexual activity while different techniques will delay the ejaculation. However, if you have medical problems consider visiting the doctor and getting medication.
Rushing Sex
Some guys often want to get things going. What they don’t know is that women take longer to get aroused. Sex is all about passion and intimacy, which play a role in women. As a man, avoid eliminating flirting and seduction and just diving right into the activity. According to Hall et al. (2010), flirting shows a romantic or physical attraction to another person. Skipping foreplay or giving short foreplay is one mistake to avoid.
Pushing Her Head Down
Men and women know what they want in bed. You might be a lover of cock sucking or one who enjoys it but remember, not all women want to go down on you. So avoid pushing her head towards your prick as this may be a huge turn-off. Also, if she is willing to go down on you, avoid pushing your head for a deeper blow job. Let her work her way however she likes. Although holding her head may feel dominant, this may seem insulting or disrespectful to some women.
Being Predictable
Most men have a good idea of intimacy in bed. The dick skill, perfect techniques, and understanding of your woman’s body mean a lot but, it always comes down to what the woman wants. However, avoid being repetitive and predictable in bed. This will make the sex boring. Keep in mind that women are more complicated than men. Don’t bring up that usual vibe, moves, and technique you use every single time, try new things. Avoid treating her the same way every time you have sex. Switch things up with new moves and techniques. However, don’t be too extreme as these may be a turnoff.
Not Concentrating
If you don’t pay attention during sex then that sex will be trash. Women mostly are the ones who fall into this mistake, but some men also do. Avoid getting distracted or shifting from the activity. This may be from anxiety, stress, or pressure to perform well. If you have a lot on your mind, simply relax and focus on the sensations and feelings. According to Carnes (2013), sex is a nice way to relieve stress.
Trying Anal Play Unexpectedly
Everyone has their preferences, and anal play is only for the chosen few. Before you think of inserting your pecker or finger in her anus, ensure she is alright with it. If you want to try anal play as something new in bed first sit her down and discuss it before you can do it. Doing this may turn her off and ruin what was supposed to be an interesting experience.
Being Over-Dominant
Most women want a man who knows his way in the bedroom, someone who dominates her. Most men know this and work towards it. However, this doesn’t give you the idea to be too aggressive and violent. Understand your partner’s body language. If she demands dominance, go for it but don’t be too much. However, there is a smaller percentage of women who also like their share of dominance in the bedroom. They don’t just want to be submissive in bed but also want to share in the action. This is quite the advantage for men since you don’t have to do all the work.
Messing Up With Condoms
If you are a guy, you know it is important to go armed in places where there is a potential for impromptu banging. It is for you and her protection as well. However, not all men do, and some carry wrong or cheap ones which can mess up things. I bet if you have condoms you know how to use them if not you need to. This will come in handy when having that quickie in semi-public areas. Consider oil-based condoms and latex ones.
Bad Odor and Breath
Women like men who smell nice. Make sure you are clean and smell good before you dive into sex. This will be of big advantage even to turn her on. Consider teeth and mouth hygiene, and once in a while visit the dentist. No woman wants to kiss a guy who has bad breath. Also, consider hygiene down there through manscaping and proper cleaning so that even as she goes down on you, she won’t be hit by a stench from your manhood.
Not Providing Aftercare
Good sex can be terrible because of how disconnected it felt once everything was over. Avoid going straight to your phone, sleeping right away, or immediately getting to other things once sex is done. This makes a woman feel unappreciated and unloved. Good sex needs good aftercare. Consider cuddling her for a while or just relaxing while talking. Keep the intimacy rolling for a bit longer before you can indulge in other things.
Conclusion
Some of these things seem obvious but a guy will rarely forget all of them. Most men end up messing things up in bed due to a lack of attention to the small things. However, it just takes a bit more thought and communication from their partner for men to understand. If you are a man capable of avoiding all these mistakes, then you are better off and at a greater chance of giving her the sex she wants and talking about it.
References
Brody, C., Berkowitz, R. L., Chhoun, P., Kaplan, K. C., Tuot, S., & Yi, S. (2021). “Feeling clean”: stigma and intravaginal practices among female entertainment workers in Cambodia. BMC Women's Health, 21(1), 1-9.
Kreuter, M., Taft, C., Siösteen, A., & Biering-Sørensen, F. (2011). Women's sexual functioning and sex life after spinal cord injury. Spinal cord, 49(1), 154-160.
Carnes, P. (2013). Don't call it love: Recovery from sexual addiction. Bantam.
Hall, J. A., Carter, S., Cody, M. J., & Albright, J. M. (2010). Individual Differences In The
Communication Of Romantic Interest: Development Of The Flirting Styles Inventory. Communication Quarterly, 58(4), 365-393.