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Some basic tips and tricks on pleasing a man in bed

Some basic tips and tricks on pleasing a man in bed

  • by Katie Peachesa
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Some basic tips and tricks on pleasing a man in bed

  • by Katie Peachesa

Content Verification

Barbara Santini
Written by:
Barbara Santini
Psychologist and Sex and Relationships Advisor
Veronika Matutyte
Medically Reviewed by:
Veronika Matutyte
Medical Doctor
Katie Lasson
Fact Checked by:
Katie Lasson
Sex and Relationship Adviser

🔍 Quick Bites: The Juicy Takeaways! 🔍

  • 💡 Communication is 🔑—talk, tease, and tantalise your way to pleasure!
  • 🔥 Foreplay isn't a warm-up, it's the main event—make it count!
  • 🕺 Confidence is sexy—own your moves like a rockstar in the bedroom.
  • 🎭 Experimentation keeps things thrilling—spice up your routine with new ideas.
  • ❤️ Emotional intimacy = better physical connection. Connect first, climax later!

🧐 Key Advice & Tips from Our Experts 🧐

  • 📢 "Communication isn't just talking—it's listening too! Pay attention to cues!"
  • 🛑 "Don't rush! Slow and sensual always wins over fast and frantic."
  • 💋 "Kissing is an art form—master it and thank us later!"
  • 👀 "Eye contact = instant chemistry. Hold that gaze and let sparks fly!"
  • 🎶 "Set the mood with music—create a playlist for unforgettable nights!"

By Ekaterina Mironova

As you well know, most of my posts are for the men with the women getting the benefits……

Well, today I need to step up and show the men some love and write one for you ladies with us men reaping the benefits…… This has nothing to do with all the requests I’ve received asking for this post ;)

So how do you please a man? Show up naked and bring beer …. Duh!!!! lol

Just kidding, though it doesn’t hurt to start there ;)

Most of the emphasis has been put on the woman when it comes not only to the bedroom but also in finding quality information on the subject of pleasing, and rightfully so.

For way too long now men have been “hitting it and quitting it” or getting theirs but not really giving pleasure…. nor taking the time to learn how to really give pleasure… I won’t get into that right now, but ladies, you know I got your back by some of my posts.

Maybe we men don’t have as many erogenous zones as you women, but we do have a few more than are being explored.

Let’s cover a few…shall we?

Some men find nipple play to be quite stimulating. Experiment with different techniques as well as how hard you suck.

Instead of going right for his penis try kissing your way down his body. There really aren’t a lot of nerve endings there to stimulate, but what it will do is build the anticipation. Most women like the “feel” of their lover’s lips on their skin, his warm breath bringing Goosebumps to the surface… it’s not like that for most men. Don’t get me wrong. We like your lips on us too, but our pleasure in this area is mostly psychological and not physical. We know what’s coming (Pun intended), but it’s the not knowing when that drives us crazy.

Now you’ve reached the bottom of his stomach so now what?…. Tease him a little…. Don’t just get right to taking him in your mouth, softly glide your lips over his erection, and maybe take him in your hand and tease him with your tongue.

Then move on. Just like the inside of a woman’s thighs are sensitive, so are ours. Spread his legs, kiss, lick, and tease his inner thighs, even where his leg starts. Right in the crook of his leg can be very sensitive and lots of pleasure can be given there. Plus, just knowing your mouth is that close to our penis is enough to get you picked up, bent over and………….. Well, ummmm. brb lol

I’m back.

Okay, let’s talk about his jewels…..yes, it’s a sensitive subject I know ;)
Unlike in porn where she takes one in her mouth and sucks hard or pulls on him, most men do not like this. We do, however, like them to be kissed, licked, and maybe even taken into your mouth…. Just be gentle…

All around the sack is a great place to give pleasure too. Lift them up and kiss beneath, then go as far back as he’ll let you. The taint (‘Taint his balls, ‘Taint his ass) can be very sensitive and a lot of men like this area to be kissed or licked. Some men like what is referred to as a rim job. That’s where you lick his anus. Some men feel like they’re gay if they like this (not that I’m bashing being gay).

Here is my take on it, “If it feels good, do it”

I’m going to stay on this subject for a minute. Most heterosexual men are more homophobic than they are willing to admit, especially with their lovers…. I’m really not sure why that is. My view is it’s not the sexual act that determines ones sexuality but the gender of the person included in that act (again, this is not a crack on being gay). We men have a G-spot too, and it’s located in our anus, but that’s a whole different blog post.

Let me throw in a tip here. Keep stimulating his penis no matter what you’re doing. If you’re pleasing another area of his body with your mouth, take his penis in your hand and gently squeeze. You can even stroke him some, but keep in mind the more you stroke him the closer you’re going to get him to orgasm… you may be cheating yourself if you stroke him too much.

With men it’s possible to lose our erection, especially if we have received stimulation and then had it stopped. For example, maybe you took him in your mouth or stroked his shaft then moved on to please other parts. He then may lose his erection and it does NOT mean what you’re doing doesn’t feel good…. it’s just the way we’re made. If you go back up to the top of his body to kiss or whatever, you don’t necessarily have to keep your hand on his penis. Lay on him, throw a leg over him and apply pressure…. use your imagination, but keep some sort of stimulation on his penis.

The blow job

I heard a friend say the worst blow job he had ever received was wonderful. I agree lol

Here are a few tips to help make it even better than wonderful.

Wetter is Better. Sloppy is fine too, so don’t spare the spit. I’m not being crude. I’m being honest. Make sure you keep it very wet when sucking him; he’ll love you for it.

Go slow. Don’t jump on it and go wide open. Take your time and let him enjoy the sensation of your sweet mouth sliding up and down him… this will also cause his orgasm to build slower and by prolonging it you allow him to experience a much harder and more intense orgasm when you finally do get him to that point.

Depending on what your goal is you may want to spare some of the attention you pay to the head. Yes, you can and should lick it, tease it and drive him crazy, even tease his slit with your tongue, but remember from the ring up to the tip is where you’re going to make him come.

If it’s during foreplay, then of course show the head some attention, but don’t come all the way up on every stroke if you’re sucking him. He’ll love it, and you’ll still have your fun during intercourse.

Use your hand along with your mouth (you’ll get him there quick). Make sure you have him plenty wet and then slide your hand up and down his shaft as you take him into your mouth. Another very pleasurable tip is to wring your hand around him while gliding up and down with your lips.

Use both hands. Have one hand holding his balls and teasing his anus (if he likes that) while the other one mimics your lips.

This post is really just a guideline based on my experience and opinion. The most important tool you have to make your sex life better is your mouth. Communication is key. Just like all women don’t like the same things, we men aren’t all the same either, so speak up and ask questions. Also, pay close attention to his body language; it will be honest even when he’s too afraid or too shy to tell you himself.


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